


Overprogrammed

by Kresniks



Category: Kuroshitsuji | Black Butler
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Androids, Eventual Smut, Hurt/Comfort, Illegal Activities, M/M, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Rape Recovery, Sex Robots
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-21
Updated: 2020-11-22
Packaged: 2021-03-06 14:14:29
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 33,672
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26020222
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kresniks/pseuds/Kresniks
Summary: Successful programmer Sebastian Michaelis gets roped into doing illegal business by a friend from university, Vincent Phantomhive.Somehow, he ends up having to test a sex robot whose AI has gone faulty, making him terrified of any idea of sex whatsoever.Sebastian was intending to get the job done as fast as possible, but he finds himself entranced by the boy's gorgeous blue eyes.
Relationships: Sebastian Michaelis/Ciel Phantomhive
Comments: 69
Kudos: 188
Collections: Kuroshitsuji





	1. Ciel

It was not unusual for Vincent to ask him out for coffee, nor for them to visit this particular coffee joint. 

It was a large place with a rustic sort of vibe - dark wood panels lined the walls, subdued yellowish light bulbs hung from the ceiling, and it had enough spaces away from prying eyes that it was easy enough to create a homely sort of private sphere. Both men settled for americanos, as usual, and the barista with honey-coloured hair sent Vincent flirtatious glances as she took his order, as usual. The place was just as empty as it always was on a Sunday evening, apart from a regular customer - a man who wore a tired old brown suit, which looked as equally worn out as the sun-bleached painting of lilies that he always sat beneath.

And yet, this time, there was something undeniably peculiar about Vincent. He was uncharacteristically quiet in response to the suggestive teasing from the barista as they ordered their drinks. And not to mention, there was the untrusting look in his eyes as he surveyed the upstairs room before picking a secluded booth on the opposite side of the room to the long windows. 

Naturally, Sebastian had a terribly bad feeling about it all.

Sebastian knew Vincent like he knew himself; not because they were especially close, but rather he had been the only classmate that he could stand to consistently be around when they had been at university together, due to the fact that they were so similar in nature. Casual, observant, conniving. 

Although, Sebastian was proud to say he was not involved in any undoubtedly illegal business, as opposed to the way that Vincent so loved to be. He had never needed to say anything; Sebastian wasn’t stupid. There was a reason why he had never been invited to Vincent’s home, just as he was sure there was a reason why he always chose this same old coffee shop.

“Certainly being secretive today, aren’t we?” Sebastian quipped as Vincent placed his coffee down and turned off his phone. It always seemed to be a different model - not that the reason was any concern of Sebastian’s. And he would quite like to keep it that way.

“Sebastian,” Vincent leaned forwards, sharp dark blue eyes keeping him pinned before lowering his voice to say:

“You’re into cute little boys, aren’t you?”

Immediately, his gut told him that this was _not_ something he wanted to involve himself in. At all.

“I don’t know what you’re going to ask of me, but the answer is no.” Sebastian scowled into the steam of his coffee.

“Just hear me out,” Vincent sighed. “It’s nothing horrific, I promise. In fact, I think you might quite enjoy it.” He grinned a devilish grin.

“Whatever it is, I don’t want any part of it.”

“Come on, Sebas-”

“In any way, shape or form,” Sebastian glared, resolute.

Vincent sighed again, twisting a suspiciously expensive-looking ring around his finger. Whatever business Vincent had gotten himself wrapped up in, it was enough that it meant him being able to afford such a thing, as it definitely would have not been afforded by the penniless student that had to practically live off of 10p packets of instant noodles and tins of baked beans who Sebastian met ten years ago.

“Sebastian, I don’t have anyone else I can ask,” he said, his grey-blue eyes solemn. His lips were set in a firm line, and he appeared to be sincere. However, that wasn’t saying much - Sebastian had seen time and time over how he could create any expression that he so wished, irregardless of his true feelings.

“Surely you’ve got your entire company to ask?” Sebastian raised an eyebrow, clearly doubtful. Sebastian was in no way poor, but it took one look at Vincent to know that he was part of another society now. They both sat with their ankles crossed, however Vincent’s legs were clad in designer trousers that cost a sum that a piece of fabric should never even be worth. Sebastian still thought such things were a waste of money - Vincent probably never even stopped to think of it anymore.

“That’s the thing - if you would just listen to me, I’ll tell you.”

There was an almost flirtatious lilt to his tone, and the gentle smile on his lips was a teasing one.

Knowing _anything_ about Vincent’s business was inherently nothing but a danger, and Sebastian had never been one to fall for his falsified faces and flirtations. Yet aside from all that, he was rather fond of the man, and he was ashamed to admit that he _was_ intrigued. Sebastian’s curiosity got the better of him, as it often did. 

He eyed Vincent cautiously before leaning back in the wooden chair, brushing his unkempt locks of dark hair away from his face, then let a shrug come to his shoulders.

“Go on then. I’ll listen, nothing more.”

“Thank you,” Vincent began. “So, recently, we’ve ventured out into the sex industry, and-”

“I don’t like where this is going.”

Vincent glared at him.

“Just _listen_ for once,” he urged, then spun his head in another faux-casual look around to make sure no one was listening. His voice came deep and suppressed. “It’s not like we’re _trafficking_ people, jeez. It’s about sex robots, alright?”

Sebastian sipped at his coffee, casting Vincent a doubtful look across the rim of the mug. In one way, he was relieved that it wasn’t quite as bad as he was expecting, but then again, there was no way in hell he could trust the business. Vincent couldn’t have had any legal greenlights on producing such things, much less ones modelled to be something so morally controversial - that much was clear, seeing how he was being even more cautious than usual today.

“Right,” Sebastian said, crossing his arms haughtily before continuing. “And? What could I possibly do for you?”

“So far, we’ve made five of them,” Vincent ignored his displeasure, and launched into eager talk about his work. “Incredibly expensive things, honestly - but we already have enough demand from those in higher society that it seems like it’s worth investing in,” he grinned. “It’s been quite the successful project. And I think they’re just your type, too. But there’s one thing.”

He then leaned forwards, resting his smug face on the heel of his hand. The words he spoke came forth in a discreet, fascinated tone.

“One of our models went wrong along the way during the testing process, like…" He thought carefully about his next words. "Almost as if something fucked with his AI processes. He started crying during usage, won't do dirty talk, won't listen to commands, screams that he doesn’t like it and all," Vincent scoffed, amused. "After that, whenever we try testing him, his systems overheat, then he starts complaining of pain and getting all sickly. Almost like some sort of… strange mechanical panic attack.”

It certainly was a rather interesting story. Sebastian had never heard of an AI developing trauma-like reactions, and neither had Vincent, judging by the bizarre proud light in his eyes as he explained the fault. Sebastian's fascination as a programmer made him want to take the thing apart and go through every single string of code he was producing - likely the very thing that Vincent was banking on him to do. Nevertheless, Sebastian still had no desire to be part of his friend’s extremely illegal business.

“And?” Sebastian gestured for him to get to the point.

“I want you to write up an error report for us.”

_Ah._ There it was.

“How about no.”

Vincent pursed his lips, clearly less than pleased with his answer.

Sebastian had already decided on his answer since the very beginning of the situation. No matter how intriguing the idea, he couldn’t afford to lose his career to any scandals now - or he’d go back to living like that sad orphan with no more than a black bin bag to hold all his belongings. The care homes he’d lived in as a child hadn’t been all too different to prison, after all.

“I know you want to uphold your reputation as an upstanding, professional programmer who writes boring little codes for aeroplanes or whatever, but I promise you no one would find out. These things cost hundreds of thousands of pounds, and I’m letting you have fun with one for _free._ ” Vincent’s eyebrows knit together, seemingly incredulous that Sebastian would pass up on such an opportunity. 

Mainly, Sebastian was just disbelieving of the fact that he truly needed Sebastian over any other programmer - something about the look in Vincent’s gentle eyes told him that he just wanted to tease him. Or perhaps he had remembered his preferences from their very brief time dating, and just wanted to see what he’d do when presented with such an opportunity. Or maybe he was trying to slowly rope him into his business. There were a few possibilities, and most of them ended in Vincent being a sadistic fuck.

“Can’t you just dispose of it then?” Sebastian averted his eyes to stare at his coffee.

“No, we need to work out what happened just so that we’ll know how to avoid it in the future with newer models. Plus, his parts are too expensive to just throw away. We'll do a factory reset once you're done. All I’m asking is that you spend a week or two with him, check out his features, and let me know your conclusions.”

“Then can’t one of your lot do it?” Sebastian grimaced. Vincent shook his head and steepled his fingers.

“Listen, Sebastian. I don’t often say this to you, nor do I ever plan on saying it again. But _please_ , as your friend, _please_ help me out. We’re busy and ran out of money, we can’t earn it back again until we start selling, and I can’t afford to find a new, trustworthy employee. As much as I hate to say it, I don’t have the time to work it out and I need your expertise.”

The same grimace sat on Sebastian’s expression. Vincent was still fiddling with the expensive sapphire ring on his finger as he pleaded with Sebastian.

“Just until you figure out what’s up with him. I _know_ you’re into cute boys - you can do whatever you want with him. _Please._ ” Vincent looked deeply into Sebastian’s eyes, a pained expression on his face.

It was true that he was a little bored with his current work. And he _did_ have a penchant for small, feminine boys. Sebastian liked Vincent, and he was willing to indulge in his game if it meant he'd get something out of it. Sebastian was certain it was a terrible business where it was possible he’d be providing for corrupt politicians, businessmen, or maybe even royalty. And yet honestly - that probably meant that if he got found out, clients would be able to cover his ass or bribe the police, hence there was little chance of him being charged with anything. Although, if anyone found out, _Vincent_ was still as good as dead, Sebastian swore to himself.

“Alright, alright. Fine. I get it,” Sebastian held up his hands in surrender, sighing. “Fuck the thing and find out what’s going on inside. It's easy enough work if you'll eventually pay me. Just two weeks, okay?” 

A victorious smirk escaped onto Vincent’s lips. He held out his hand, and Sebastian shook it firmly.

“I could kiss you right now,” Vincent leaned closer, and snaked his fingers out to tug on Sebastian’s cuff. Sebastian made a show of brushing the offending hand away, along with a theatrical sigh.

“Well, as long as you don’t, that’s fine,” Sebastian chuckled. “You owe me big time.”

“Of course,” Vincent sampled his coffee triumphantly, fingers now firmly placed around the cup. “I’ll drop him off at yours tonight. And I’m sure this goes without saying, but you can’t tell anyone. Not even your cat.”

His black cat, Chérie, was entirely trustworthy and a wonderful girl, so sentiment offended him a little.

“But she will be there anyway, so -”

“Yeah yeah, smart arse. You get the picture.”

They both laughed.

Despite his willingness to indulge Vincent, Sebastian would have been lying if he said he wasn’t at all apprehensive about the whole thing. They continued to converse on this and that, everything yet not much at all, discussing deeply yet not personally. All the while, Sebastian was specifically trying to _not_ think about how apprehensive he was about their agreement, and instead indulged himself in the familiar, warm atmosphere of the coffee shop, and his focusing on discussing his opinions on the decline of physical media. 

They left their empty coffee cups on the table, and as they descended the stairs and walked past the bar to get to the exit, Vincent said his goodbyes to the honey-haired barista and the man in the tired brown suit. He was fast to get away from the premises, as always, and Sebastian was left with a simple reminder that he would arrive at around 9 o’clock that evening.

  
  


* * *

  
  


Waiting at home, Sebastian realised just how unprepared he was. 

Admittedly, his salary was high and his apartment was nice. Nice - as in there was a hot tub on the balcony, a bar in the spacious open-plan kitchen, and the bath ran itself automatically. But still, Sebastian was a minimalist. He had only one large bed, and a futon packed away somewhere for if someone who wasn’t a sexual partner happened to stay over. He didn’t even have anything for a kid to amuse themselves with. No gaming consoles, no modern fiction, no art supplies. Just a television, and the computer he used for work. 

Hell - would a robot even need the same stuff that a real person would? In the end, he _was_ just an AI - and AIs can’t truly get bored. Not really. Did he even eat or sleep? If Sebastian had confidence in anything, it was his cooking, thus the kitchen was the only room that was truly decked out with all sorts of gadgets. He wasn’t averse to sharing it with someone, but if the boy couldn’t eat or drink, then his ideas for entertainment were pretty much entirely out the window. Apart from sex, that was.

The doorbell chimed twice when Vincent showed up at 9 o’clock sharp, when Sebastian had just finished cooking dinner. He made sure the stove was fully turned off, then buzzed Vincent into the apartment block via the intercom next to the front door.

Sebastian turned to look in the silver-framed full-length mirror just there. He took a moment to fix his hair that had been sent astray by the heat of cooking, as well as smooth out the creases that had settled into the folds of his jumper throughout the day. It was then that he caught himself - why was he checking himself out to make sure he was looking good for a _robot_? Was he really so lonely that a few months without sex had turned him into a desperate man, craving any sort of company whatsoever?

God. 

Three succinct knocks sounded at the front door, and Sebastian promptly unlatched it, letting it swing open. Vincent stood there, tall (although still a little shorter than Sebastian), and looking as smug as ever. 

“Do excuse us,” Vincent announced, eagerly pushing past Sebastian into the entranceway. He then reached behind his left hip to push a small, dark-haired boy into the apartment, obviously keen to get him away from anybody who might be watching.

For a moment, Sebastian found himself stunned by Vincent’s work; looking at the android, you really would think he was entirely human. Although, perhaps his ethereal beauty was something to give it away just a little. Sebastian hated how right Vincent had been - he thought he was gorgeous.

The boy’s dark hair had a slight blue tint to it, which stood out in stark contrast to his unblemished, shockingly pale skin and dainty pink lips. He was maybe five foot tall, and he was a skinny little thing. Sebastian would want to feed him up, if it weren’t for the fact that he knew it probably wouldn’t do a thing to his appearance. His wide eyes were a deep blue that complemented his hair colour well, and those irises were outlined by thick, black eyelashes. Sebastian could only wonder how charming the functioning models would be, seeing as how he was taken so aback by his beauty even while the boy stood there in his entranceway looking like a deer stuck in headlights. His gorgeous blue eyes stared into nothing; they may have had a shine to them, but they did not look quite alive as he stood there, empty.

Vincent closed the door behind them before handing Sebastian a single USB with a round device on the end of the wire.

“This is all you’ll need - his charger. It’s wireless, so don’t fret about having to wire him up. When he needs charging, all you have to do is put him somewhere near the port. You can also charge him up a little with food and drink, so I guess you could use the feeding method too, if you wanted. People out there have all sorts of weird kinks,” he chuckled. “And when you check his internal processes, the access code is how many words there are in my favourite song, timesed by how many times you were sick at my birthday party. Okay?”

Sebastian fiddled with the wire in his hand and nodded in a daze, still somewhat taken aback by just how lifelike the android was.

“Well, that’s that. I don’t want to be here for any longer than I need to be, so I’ll come to check in on you some time later this week,” Vincent announced. “Good luck.” 

He was already turning on his heel to leave. Sebastian suddenly felt a little panicked that he would be left alone with the boy. Robot. Whatever. Despite his technical knowledge, something of this scale felt significantly out of his depth.

“Wait, you can’t just leave me like this,” he called. “I mean…”

Vincent froze on the spot.

“You mean what?” He replied, a smirk on his lips as he turned to look over his shoulder at Sebastian. That fucker - he obviously revelled in being the one in control for once.

“Don’t be like that - you _know_ what I mean. Generally, how does he… _work_? Does he need sleep? Does he go to the toilet? Does he shower? Do I need to… clean him out?” Sebastian asked, a little flustered.

Vincent laughed.

“I love seeing you stumped by something for once. The last time I saw your adorable face looking like that was when Agni told you your signature curry is flavourless.”

Sebastian rolled his eyes.

“Oh, do shut up. You don’t have to keep bringing that up, you know. I am aware that it brought you great pleasure to see me at a loss.”

“Yes, well. You’re at your cutest that way,” Vincent teased, moving to give his cheek a little pinch. Sebastian seized his hand before he could even touch him. 

“But seriously, you don’t need to worry so much,” Vincent continued, unfazed by Sebastian’s reflexes. “Let me put it like this: for all intents and purposes, he’s like a real human. His body is designed to function in the same way as a human one as much as possible. He doesn’t _need_ sleep, per se - but it’s a good idea to give the system a rest every now and again. Oh, one thing: there are no sperm in his semen, so you needn’t worry about getting pregnant,” he smirked.

“Ha ha, very funny,” Sebastian pushed his shoulder half-heartedly. “Could you at least leave me a number for if anything goes wrong? I can’t just count on you to _eventually_ call me from one of your burner phones.”

Vincent thought for a second, grey-blue eyes to the ceiling and lips pursed. He crossed his arms and tapped a long index finger against his elbow, seemingly weighing up the pros and cons of what Sebastian had intended to be an incredibly simple question. Sebastian thought that working in the black market must be extremely stressful stuff, if covering your tracks has to be so extensive. 

After what seemed like a great deliberation, Vincent waltzed across the smooth white tiling towards the sideboard, and helped himself to a sticky-note and pen. He scribbled something down, then presented the note to Sebastian with the full length of his arm, casting a disdainful look at him as if he were pushing his luck by asking for something so precious. 

“You had better take care of it. Put it somewhere encrypted on your computer, and then burn this paper,” Vincent said lowly, deadly serious. Sebastian could never tell whether there was any actual risk involved in such things and Vincent was just covering his tracks, or whether he was extremely paranoid and on-edge.

“Of course, Your Highness,” Sebastian smiled, amused by Vincent’s insistence. He whipped the piece of paper from between Vincent’s fingertips, then stuffed it into his trouser pocket. “Hopefully I shan’t even need to use it.”

“I would hope so. I am very busy, after all. Don’t call me up just because he’s wet the bed again,” Vincent said with a wave of his hand, already turning back towards the front door to leave again.

Well. He certainly hadn’t been briefed on _that_ problem, but it was highly likely that Vincent had left out some details in order to make the job seem easier. In fact, if he _hadn’t,_ Sebastian would be more shocked.

“See you soon, Sebastian,” he waved again before opening the front door and closing it promptly behind him, as quick to leave as ever.

And so, Sebastian was left alone with a faulty sex robot standing listlessly in his entranceway, dressed in a large winter coat that covered most of his tense-looking body. Even if he was just a product of software and engineering, there was no way Sebastian could merely forget his manners. 

After a few moments of awkward silence, Sebastian bent down a little to be more his level, before saying,

“Well. Shall we get you out of your coat?”

Empty, deep blue eyes looked up at him. It seemed like he’d heard him, but he made no response.

“You can’t just stand there in your outdoor clothes forever,” Sebastian said, trying his best to be gentle. “Because you’re going to be living here with me for a while. Vincent did tell you that, didn’t he?”

The boy continued to stare, and then eventually graced Sebastian with as much as a shrug. Sebastian took that as good of a response as any, and reached forwards to undo the top button of his coat.

This was a bad move, apparently. The boy suddenly shied away, stance becoming completely rigid as he looked at Sebastian with an expression that was undeniably fearful. His narrow shoulders hunched inwards, and his small feet shuffled on the tiled flooring as his knees locked up. His lips were pursed, and those lifeless blue eyes were framed by scared, upturned eyebrows. Sebastian retracted his hand slowly, holding his palm upwards to show that he was no threat.

This was going to be much harder than he’d originally thought.

“I promise I’m not going to hurt you. I was only going to take your coat off,” Sebastian said quietly, a little offended. “Unless you’d like to do it yourself. That works too.”

The boy looked a little as if he were going to cry, eyes trained on the floor and eyebrows knitted together. Sebastian wondered if he really was going to have to do things by force. He didn’t want to, but at the end of the day, the boy was a robot and it was Sebastian’s job to ensure this kind of response wouldn’t happen again. Not to be his therapist or his dad or something.

Luckily, he eventually brought his own fingers to the top button, his tiny hands trembling as he struggled to undo it. It took time, and it would have been much less of an ordeal if Sebastian were to do it. But if the boy was happier that way, then so be it. 

He timidly slipped the thick coat off his shoulders, and then offered it to Sebastian. His hands were still shaking, but not quite so much.

“Thank you,” Sebastian said softly, taking the fact that he was at least interacting with him as some sort of truce. Or perhaps he simply felt he had no choice. Either way, Sebastian just hoped he would come to see that he wasn’t all that bad. He hung the boy’s coat up next to his own, then turned back to him, hands on hips.

The boy was dressed in a button-up white shirt and the shortest black shorts known to man, along with knee-high black socks. A blue ribbon was tied in a bow around his shirt collar. Sebastian would have been lying if he’d said the sight didn’t please him just a little; Vincent had likely chosen the outfit with him in mind, after all. He wasn’t sure if he was touched or perturbed by the gesture.

The bot’s primary functions were built around sex, of course, but still - Sebastian couldn’t help but feel like a pervert, staring at him dressed like that. He was so human-like that Sebastian found himself unable to treat him like a sex toy, but then again, his principles were likely to be wildly different to those for whom the device was intended. And despite his pride in his adept small-talk, he had to admit he was a little at a loss for conversation. It was the opposite of an everyday situation. More like a ‘never’ situation. Sebastian didn’t even know such high functioning androids existed, nevermind having to live with one.

Still, Sebastian remembered his manners. The boy was still a guest in his home.

“What’s your name? I’m Sebastian,” he offered. 

“A name?” The boy looked a little bewildered. 

Forgetting their line of conversation for a moment, Sebastian’s heart may have fluttered a little at the sound of his voice. It was smooth, and rather low despite being unbroken; it was low enough that it sounded masculine, but not so high that it could have only belonged to a child. Sebastian fancied that it would be a rather pretty singing voice if trained well. Having said that - his voice box function must be synthesized, Sebastian reminded himself, so it was entirely possible he could sing perfectly with no effort whatsoever. Sebastian wanted to see if he could hear it, once he would let him. It really was an endearing tone.

“They didn’t give you one?” Sebastian replied after a moment, wondering why.

“They call me number four,” he said vacantly. Lifeless as it was, Sebastian marvelled once more at that voice. No doubt it was designed to sound appealing during less innocent activities, but Sebastian appreciated it as a work of art.

“That’s not a very good name for someone as pretty as you. We can’t be having that,” Sebastian smiled at him.

He shrugged again.

“Let me think on it. I like to think I can fit a name to character rather well,” Sebastian said before walking towards the kitchen, beckoning in an attempt to make the boy come in and settle at least a little. “In the meantime, can I interest you in some food? I just need to dish it up. Although, I don’t suppose you’ve ever eaten aubergine or halloumi cheese before?”

The boy remained with his feet planted firmly on the floor, showing no sign of wanting to come any further into the apartment at all. Sebastian didn’t expect him to warm up very quickly, so that fact didn’t surprise him at all; what did was what he said.

“I-... I don’t want to eat cum,” he said, voice shaky.

_What._

Half of Sebastian wanted to laugh, but the other half wouldn’t let him do so, seeing that pitifully sad, worried expression on the boy’s face. It would be bad manners to laugh at that hollow expression.

“Oh dear, you’ve clearly gotten something wrong here,” Sebastian sighed, walking back towards the boy again. He took a step backwards as Sebastian got closer. “Nobody’s going to feed you cum. I’m just talking about dinner, okay? You know, food. Pasta, fish, vegetables - those sorts of things. Have you had any of those before?”

The boy shot Sebastian a severely doubtful look, still very apprehensive.

“You’re not going to make me eat cum?” he asked warily, obviously not quite believing it. Sebastian blinked.

“Of course not. I’d never serve a treasured guest something so foul, much less force them to eat it,” Sebastian assured him. “You’ve never had proper food before?”

He gave Sebastian a wary glance once again, but then he shook his head, pretty blue hair falling over one eye.

On the one hand, Sebastian knew that the androids were intended entirely for sex, and there would be little reason to treat them as if they weren’t. It was natural to test that the robot would be able to swallow semen properly, more than anything else. You don’t teach a Roomba how to clean the windows. Although, Sebastian did think it a little shoddy of Vincent not to check whether he could properly digest more complex foods, from a technical point of view. And he still couldn’t help but feel sorry for the boy, thinking the first thing he would do was shove bodily fluids down his throat. The thought alone of how he must have hated it made him shiver.

“Dear, you poor thing - not knowing the joys of cuisine,” Sebastian cooed. “Well, my little lord, you’re in for a treat tonight. They say my cooking is the best in the entire town.”

Sebastian beckoned him towards the kitchen once again, and this time, albeit very cautiously, the boy followed behind him. Sebastian allowed himself a little smile, and reached up to a cupboard above the counter to get out some bowls. A large one for himself, and a small one for the boy, both made of bone china and adorned with a hand-painted rose pattern. He used a knife to section off one quarter of the baked aubergine, and carefully picked it up to spoon it into the little bowl. He took less care when spooning the rest into his own.

“There,” Sebastian announced. “Come take a seat.” 

He pulled out a chair from the table, both of which were tall, and for a moment he wondered if the boy would even be tall enough to get on. But still, the boy padded over the table in a straight line, and managed to haul himself up onto the chair, his little legs left swinging in mid-air. He suddenly seemed less apprehensive; perhaps the smell was making him a little curious?

Sebastian set the small bowl down in front of him and placed a fork next to it, then took a seat himself, facing the boy.

“If you don’t like it, feel free to just leave it. I’ll eat it,” he reassured him. “But do at least try a little bit.”

The boy showed no sign of having heard him, but he did then pick the fork up in his right hand and stared at it curiously. It was a strange sight; Sebastian had never seen somebody hold a fork as if it could explode at any second before. Clumsily, he stuck the prongs into a piece of cheese covered with sauce, and brought it up towards his nose to sniff at it timidly. His nostrils twitched slightly, and Sebastian found himself wanting to laugh. He did suppress it, however, as he didn’t want to put him under pressure by alerting him to the fact that he was watching him so closely.

Finally, he popped the sauce-covered halloumi into his mouth, and began to chew. 

For the first time, Sebastian registered a change in his expression. After a few moments, he stopped chewing and blinked at the dish in surprise, almost as if he’d never seen anything so mystifying. His blue eyes were wide with something other than fear, and Sebastian found himself enjoying the expression very much.

“Thish iz food?” he spoke with his mouth full, to which Sebastian couldn’t suppress a grimace, and yet he didn’t dare to ruin the moment of his first ever time experiencing a proper meal. He now gave the perplexed look he had been giving the bowl to Sebastian.

“That it is,” Sebastian smiled. “Does it taste good?”

The boy stared back down at the bowl again, and then lifted a piece of aubergine between his lips. He chewed it as if he were seriously consuming through every one of his senses, surveying the texture minutely as he chewed and swallowed the vegetable.

“Yeah,” he said finally, and his expression had become somewhat softer than what it was ten minutes ago. He licked his dainty pink lips, less guarded as he simply focused on the dish before him.

He obviously still wasn’t all too sure what to make of his new situation, nor Sebastian himself, but Sebastian had faith in the power of food to bring someone at least a little sense of comfort. The boy may have not trusted him, but the fact that he trusted and liked his _food_ was getting somewhere.

“You know,” Sebastian began. “I think I’ve got a pretty good name for you. Your hair is such a beautiful deep blue, like the ocean, perhaps - but I think it’s more like the sky. You’re going to broaden your horizons just like this from here on out. And in French, it’s a pretty word, It’s-”

“Ciel. I do have translation software.”

Sebastian was a little taken aback for a moment, shocked that the timid boy would interject. He even seemed a little surprised himself; he bashfully averted his eyes and pursed his lips as if he didn’t know what had suddenly overcome him. Sebastian reckoned that the good food had made him forget his worries for just a moment. It made him smile.

“Of course you do, please excuse me,” he replied, smirking. “Well, what do you think of it? Ciel.”

He chewed his lip as he thought, and soon graced Sebastian with a shrug. There was a shyness in his body language.

“Okay,” he said in a monotone - but there may have been just a little more life to his voice. Sebastian found himself smiling at the bashful state of the boy once more.

“Ciel,” Sebastian tried out the name on his tongue. “I hope we’ll get on very well over these next few weeks.”

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [twitter](http://twitter.com/atsukunai)


	2. Chérie

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings in this chapter for bedwetting and mild eye horror (plastic eyes, not real eyes - there is no blood).

  


  


Sebastian had learned very quickly on that first evening that despite being a robot, and on top of that, despite being intended for sex, Ciel had quite the appetite. 

He finished off every single morsel of Sebastian’s prided cooking, and Sebastian could have sworn that Ciel would have licked the bowl clean if it weren’t for how apprehensive he felt in Sebastian’s presence. Even if he didn’t trust Sebastian, and suspected that he might do terrible things to him, he at least looked at the remaining sauce at the bottom of his bowl with a sort of reverence. Seeing that look on his face was progress enough.

For dessert, Sebastian had nothing special - he tried him on some ice cream, to which Ciel was much less anxious about, having begun to associate being fed as a pleasurable experience. Thankfully, the supermarket-brand ice cream was also given Ciel’s seal of approval, judging by the way he quietly revelled in each spoonful until there was none left. He sighed with a smooth-pitched signal of contentment as he placed the spoon into the bowl, then looked up to Sebastian with those vacant round eyes to await his next command.

With the first hurdle overcome, Sebastian looked to their next steps over the coming days. Firstly, there was the work that he had yet to complete before Vincent had sprung this entire ordeal on him, and that phone number that Vincent had been so keen for him to destroy. 

Sebastian got to his feet, slowly so as to not startle the boy, and stacked their plates and cutlery up together. He felt the heavy weight of Ciel’s gaze on him as he busied himself with clearing up. It was a little unsettling; Sebastian hadn’t the slightest inkling as to what he might be thinking, as his stony gaze was unchanging and unreadable for the most part - he could only tell that he was skittish, and in some sort of dissociative fugue.

He raised a hand in his direction to get his attention, not daring to try touching him again. Ciel’s gaze was fixed straight on him.

“Sorry to be so rude on your first night here, but there’s some work I still need to take care of tonight. You can just lounge around and watch TV if you like,” Sebastian said as he piled up their dirty dishes and stacked them in the dishwasher. He looked over his shoulder again to seek out a response, and found that Ciel’s small features were tense once more - but he at least nodded. Sebastian gave him an apologetic smile. “Sorry I don’t have much else to keep you amused.”

Ciel moved to get down from the stool, but he was such a shaky and weak thing that it was reckless to even try. His black socks slipped on the tiled flooring as he tried to lower one leg to the floor, and his little fingers were gripping onto the counter for dear life as he attempted to keep himself upright. Sebastian sensed that his safety was in clear danger, and quickly stepped over to offer a hand out to him, if he needed to take it. In his heart, he knew that Ciel would most likely rather break all of his limbs before willingly grabbing onto a strange man, but he couldn’t stand by and do nothing. He could at least give him the option - but if he was in genuine danger, Sebastian would have no choice but to grab him. Besides, Vincent would undoubtedly kill him if he called up asking for repairs within mere hours of being entrusted to him.

Ciel shot the outstretched hand a frightened look, and vehemently shook his head. He froze up completely until Sebastian withdrew his hand, clearly still not comfortable with the prospect of being touched by a strange man. Even if his cooking  _ was _ heavenly.

“ _ Don’t _ ,” Ciel said in a strained voice, limbs trembling as he unsteadily lowered himself to the floor. Despite Ciel’s insistence, Sebastian wasn’t all too sure that he could manage by himself - so he stayed faithfully by his side until he had safely planted both feet on the floor, just in case he needed to catch him. He quickly backed away from Sebastian once he had successfully dismounted, casting him a judgemental expression as if he refused to believe that any man would ever keep his hands to himself. Sebastian tried not to take it personally.

“Perhaps we should sit somewhere else next time - I don’t think those chairs are safe for you. That teaches me for getting furniture designed for tall people,” Sebastian laughed, attempting to dispel some of the boy’s anxiety. Ciel’s suspicious glance then turned to somewhat of a pout, and he gripped nervously at the hem of his black shorts with his fingertips. It was undeniably cute.

“I’m not that short,” he muttered. Sebastian would have surely missed it, had his hearing not been so sharp. Reflecting on how he had used that same sarky tone to interject earlier, too, Sebastian began to wonder if there was actually a rather fiery personality underneath all that disturbance and hurting. For a fleeting moment, a thought that he wanted to see more of that feistiness crossed his mind. The contrast of character to appearance was endearing. Sebastian chuckled.

“If you say so, my Lord,” Sebastian quipped, grinning. “Well, feel free to settle down on the sofa. If you need me or if you want anything, I’ll just be at my computer, just there.” He pointed to a large desk on one side of the open-plan lounge, perpendicular to the television.

He paced over to where he had pointed and sat at the office chair there, leaving Ciel to settle on the sofa behind him, giving him some well-earned reprieve from Sebastian’s presence, which still seemed to be rather frightening to him. Sebastian pressed the power button on the computer case with his left hand, and dug his hand into his trouser pocket to produce the crumpled-up sticky note, where Vincent had messily scrawled numbers across it.

He stared at it while the computer booted up, and sighed. He was going to have to decline any future jobs coming up for the foreseeable future if he was going to have any success with working out just  _ what _ had gone wrong with Ciel’s input processes, as well as when, how and why. It would be easier if he could just fuck him and see the exact stages that his systems were going through, but - well. 

Hypotheticals were no good. There was no justifiable reason as to why he  _ couldn’t _ still just fuck him and let this job be over much faster, but somewhere down the line, Sebastian had gone soft. He could easily overpower him. Easily muffle his screams as he did whatever he liked. It wasn’t like he didn’t  _ want _ to do wholly indecent things to him - Ciel was exactly his type - and it wasn’t like he wasn’t known to sleep around. But once again, Sebastian had  _ principles. _ He would enjoy it much more thoroughly if it were a pleasant experience for both parties, even if one party was technically an object. And when he saw those azure irises, something within him wouldn’t let him be unkind to the boy - although he didn’t like to admit it.

After logging in, he looked behind him just to check on Ciel for a moment, expecting to see him sitting on the plush light blue sofa just there. However, the sight that greeted him was definitely unusual - although not unwelcome.

Ciel hadn’t even made it to the sofa; he stood frozen, mid-stride, his small fists clenched up by his waist as he stood there. Sebastian saw the confused, nervous tilt to his dark eyebrows, and followed his line of sight to see Chérie, his black cat, also frozen mid-stride on the plush white rug, and wearing an alarmingly similar expression to Ciel’s as she stared him down.

It was inarguably a comical scene, and Sebastian brought a hand to cover his lips in order to keep himself from laughing. He’d never seen a stand-off quite like it - a sex robot and a cat, ready to pounce at one another at any second. Up until now, Sebastian had been so overcome by the bizarre situation that was thrust upon him that he hadn’t even thought about how to introduce Chérie to the robot. And to be honest, he hadn’t expected there to be any issues. But then again, Chérie was most likely extremely confused by this strange boy who _ looked _ completely human, but didn’t smell quite right. Not to mention, she was probably jealous that Ciel was taking up all the time that would usually be spent cuddling her, too.

“Ah, Ciel,” Sebastian stood up from where he sat, and strode over to scoop Chérie’s cautious form into his arms. She trilled in protest, but he ruffled her fur in an attempt to signal that there was nothing to worry about. After a moment, she settled down more in the familiar comfort of Sebastian’s arms, and he chanced taking a step closer to Ciel. “I forgot to tell you about Chérie here. She’s been living with me for three years now - used to be rather fearsome when I rescued her, but now she’s gone completely soft with all the love and affection she gets, look.”

_ A bit like me _ , he thought to himself dryly.

He lowered himself down to Ciel’s level. Ciel recoiled slightly with a subtle look of disdain on his face, but he stayed perfectly still as Sebastian introduced her to him, receptive for once. Sebastian tickled just under Chérie’s chin - her favourite spot - and she purred appreciatively as she nestled against the warmth of his chest. Most pleased with the attention, she seemed to forget the intruder for a moment while Ciel ran his eyes over her as if he had never seen a cat before. In fact, he most likely hadn’t. 

Over a few minutes, as he saw that she was no threat, and that she did nothing but lay sleepily in Sebastian’s arms, Ciel’s body language softened. Though, disdain was still perceptible in his tiny scrunched up nose.

“See?” Sebastian said quietly. “She’s just a big softie.” He was thankful that she was actually cooperating - perhaps she could sense that he was much more afraid than she was. “I promise she won’t hurt you, she’s very friendly. She already took out all of her scratchy kitten moods on me long ago,” he laughed. “And not to mention, her fur is very soft. Why don’t you have a go at petting her?”

Ciel huffed.

“She’s  _ weird, _ ” he said, upper lip all scrunched up. Sebastian felt himself wince; he wasn’t angry, no - but still, he did not take well to others insulting his little angel, even if they were extremely attractive and cute.

“I expect she thinks the same of you, a strange boy intruding on her home,” Sebastian smiled, eyebrows raised. “So that makes us all even, doesn’t it? She’s like family to me, so you’ll have to get used to her. Here.”

Sebastian shuffled slightly closer, dropping down to his knee, offering him access to the cat nestled in his arms. Ciel remained doubtful, looking at Chérie as if she had grown a second head. Nevertheless, he bravely stretched his shaky hand out. Sebastian stayed completely still as Ciel slowly leant over to brush his small left hand over the soft fur on the back of her neck. She eyed him cautiously, but she was happy enough, and thus allowed him to thread her fur in between his fingertips until his nervous curiosity was sated. Ciel was still giving her a less-than-pleased look, but he didn’t seem quite so scared anymore, and they were well on track to being able to live together in harmony. If they hadn’t been, Sebastian would have had no choice but to send Ciel back to the alleged Hell that was Vincent’s company. Chérie always came first, after all.

“See? That wasn’t so bad. She’s very affectionate once she gets used to you,” Sebastian said.

“She’s still weird,” Ciel said, eyebrows knitted as he retracted his palm. But he wasn’t alarmed by her presence anymore, and he was speaking in his default sweet tone, so Sebastian deemed the introduction a success.

He placed Chérie down on the sky-blue sofa, and she made a substitute of him out of the white cushion there, nestling into the soft fabric in the same way that she had been resting her head on his chest. Ciel apprehensively walked around the sofa and perched his bottom on the opposite end, his bare legs awkwardly knocking at the knees. He sat as if he didn’t quite know how. Sebastian only hoped that he would be able to relax more over time.

He let the worry go, and reached for the remote to turn the TV on. He scrolled through the channel guide, but there didn’t seem to be much on that was appropriate - he thought, as if there was much that  _ could _ be inappropriate for a sex robot. Still, it felt inherently inconsiderate to expose a freshly traumatised boy to all of the sex and violence that they show on late night television. It was coming up to eleven thirty, thus most things were halfway through airing, but he did manage to find some random documentary about wildlife in the Scottish Highlands, so he left it on. Ciel stared at it just as blankly as he did most other things; it was a new experience, but he was by no means happy about it. Sebastian sighed. He wasn’t sure what else he could do to make the boy feel at home.

In the end, he decided to stop trying, and went back over to his desk. He would at least be well within earshot if something was wrong.

As he was oh-so kindly advised by Vincent, Sebastian copied the phone number into an encrypted file, saved it, and then used a lighter to burn the sticky note in the sink. He rinsed it away once it was no more than a papery pile of ash.

Next, he plugged the device that Vincent had given him into the PC. A software called PXAI was pre-installed on the device, and it alerted him that the computer was successfully connected to “Prototype No.4”, as they called him. There was nothing else on there; it seemed that it was necessary to use the software in order to look at any of his files, and a quick perusal of the program made it apparent that it could also be used to write codes for the bots, as well as to display the current processes of the AI. He was sure Ciel would notice if he suddenly started rooting around in his brain, and Sebastian didn’t really want to bother him with any more stressful experiences tonight, so he made a note to himself to try and get a feel for what was going on in his “brain” tomorrow. If he tried to access any files now, he expected Ciel would panic.

PXAI was similar to other software that he had experience with, so he was rather confident with using it already, as all the commands and options were grouped the same way as other programs. In addition, the codes were written in C++, Java, Python and Prolog, and Sebastian already knew the languages well. Once again, he found himself impressed with Vincent’s work; the software was no doubt a program that he and his dodgy colleagues had designed themselves - and it was a damn good one. Not only did having their own software mean that their coding practices were safe from being accessed by third parties, but it was also designed to be intuitive for an experienced programmer to use, and it wasn’t messy or disorganised in the way that many unofficial softwares are.

Once satisfied with the ins and outs of the new software, Sebastian spent the next couple of hours wrapped up in his “boring little aeroplane codes”, as Vincent so nicely put it. Once he tied up the loose ends on the code, it was ready to be sent back to the company, and then he would be free to focus all of his energies onto Ciel, both practically and mentally. Without the shadow of other work hanging over his head, he would hopefully be able to complete the tests to a high standard. He let a huge sigh escape his lips as the clicked the “shut down” button, then he stretched out his long legs underneath the desk and stretched his fists up into the air. He was tired, and desperate for sleep.

The documentary channel was still playing in the background, and Sebastian finally mustered enough physical energy to stand up and check up on Ciel.

From between the low light of the table lamp and the soft blue light from the television, a wonderfully heartwarming sight greeted him. At some point, Ciel had brought his feet up onto the sofa, and he was snuggled up into the corner of the cushions. And then, there on his lap, Chérie had spread across his thighs, and was in a deep sleep with her head propped up on his stomach. Ciel was lazily rubbing a hand into her fur in a circular pattern, and his eyes were sleepily drooping closed and then opening again in a state of half-awareness. Sebastian would have been lying if he said he didn’t think the both of them utterly adorable. Obviously, they had warmed up to each other, and seeing Ciel look so unguarded and at peace with the cat was such a relief. There was hope.

“Ciel?” Sebastian hushed, not wanting to startle him.

“Mmm?” He said, blinking his eyes blearily, still rubbing at Chérie’s neck.

“Sorry to disturb you. It’s bedtime now, and Chérie will probably follow me. I would offer you the futon, but the sofa works too. Are you happy to sleep there?”

Everything was fine. In fact, everything was going swimmingly. They were getting on well. Ciel was letting his guard down around Sebastian more and more, not constantly worried he was going to be forced into sexual acts anymore. They were getting used to each other. And then, Ciel looked at him with such terror in his azure eyes that everything reverted back to square one.

Sebastian didn’t know what it was that he’d said, but suddenly, the mood was ruined.

Ciel’s hands suddenly seized up in Chéries fur, and she stirred irritably, clearly not impressed with how his nails were now poking into her. She caught sight of Sebastian standing over them, then slinked out from between Ciel’s arms, and leaped onto the floor to circle around Sebastian’s legs instead. However, Ciel’s hands were still frozen rigid just where they had been around Chérie, as if there were now an invisible cat on his lap. His lip began to tremble.

“Bed…?” Ciel said with a sort of whimper. Sebastian’s eyebrows drew together.

“Yes, I’m going to bed for the night. You’re tired as well, aren’t you?” Sebastian clarified, still completely oblivious as to what on Earth was troubling the boy so much.

“No…” his sweet voice trembled. His breathing came heavier. “I don’t… I don’t wanna get fucked again…” He peered up at Sebastian, round eyes wide with fear, staring as if he was replaying something behind his eyes rather than actually  _ looking  _ at Sebastian. “Don’t make me come to bed…  _ Please, _ don’t make me…” he whimpered.

_ Oh. _

Suddenly, it clicked.  _ Bed _ , for Ciel, meant getting fucked before going to sleep. For him, a sex robot,  _ bed _ was synonymous with - well, sex. He knew nothing of having a nice cup of tea, or reading a good book, or listening to relaxing music before bed. There were none of those calming rituals associated with bedtime for him - only sex. All he knew was being made to pleasure a human, and then likely being trapped in their arms while they slept, during which he probably laid awake, crying.

“Oh,  _ Ciel _ ,” Sebastian sighed, plopping himself down on the other end of the sofa. “I don’t know how to make this any more clear for you. I am not going to force you to have sex with me. I know you have bad experiences, but when I say it’s bedtime, I mean, quite literally, that it’s time to go to sleep. You won’t even sleep in the same bed as me - unless you wanted to, that is.”

Ciel looked up at him hesitantly, eyes watery from underneath his thick eyelashes.

“...I can just stay here?” he hedged, moving his hand to squish the cushion underneath his bottom.

“You can stay wherever you like,” Sebastian assured him. “Do you need to brush your teeth?”

  
Ciel bit his lip, still very unsure.

“I can’t do it by myself,” he admitted, looking ashamed. “But I don’t… I don’t want…”

“You don’t like being touched, do you? Don’t worry, I understand,” Sebastian smiled. “Perhaps we can do it another time.”

Ciel shrugged. It was a better response than crying, anyhow.

“Well then,” Sebastian stood up, tucking a long strand of dark hair behind his ear. “I shan’t keep you awake any longer. Goodnight, Ciel.”

He picked up a blanket from the armchair and placed it next to Ciel on the sofa. He then gave Ciel a little wave before he switched off the light, and moved towards the corridor. He only managed a few steps before a small voice called out to him.

“Wait,” he said quietly. Sebastian stopped in his tracks, and turned around to see a very faint blue glow in the darkness. There must have been some sort of tiny LEDs in those beautiful blue eyes, making them shine even when there was no light to reflect.

“Yes?” Sebastian said, looking towards the light in the darkness. He was strangely happy to have been called out to; he was certain that he would have stayed silent and suffered with whatever the problem was just a few hours ago.

“You have to give me permission to sleep.”

For some reason, it made Sebastian chuckle bitterly. He could understand why some people would find owning such an android enjoyable, but frankly, being put in such a dominant position made Sebastian feel a little uncomfortable. It  _ did _ make sense to have such a thing be command-based; it would be extremely inconvenient if your phone just turned off whenever it felt like it. But still, it felt wrong for him to be able to control the most basic of human behaviours when the device was so scarily human-like.

“Okay, then how about this. Right now, I am giving you permission to sleep whenever you feel tired. Does that work?” He grinned.

“...Yeah,” Ciel replied. Sebastian had liked the sound of his voice when he was scared and whimpering - but then again, he truly adored the delightful smooth tone to it when he was fully aware and functioning. If they could work this out together, then Sebastian would be honored if Ciel would  _ let _ him do whatever he liked, and cry out in that smooth, lyrical tone.

“Goodnight, little Lord,” Sebastian said once again, smiling to himself as he left Ciel alone in the lounge and retired to his own bedroom.

  
  


* * *

  
  
  
  


Sebastian was awoken by the most horrifying, wrecked of screams.

Confused in his half-conscious state, he groaned and scowled as he peered over to look at the digital clock on his bedside table. The glaring display read 7:07AM - still more than an hour before he would usually wake up. His brain, which had completely forgotten about yesterday’s events, whirled about in sleep-induced disorientation upon processing the fact that the shrill noise was not his alarm clock. A cat’s paw prodded at his cheek, trying to wake him up.

_ “No!” _

The broken howling continued, and it was only then that clarity and awareness properly returned to him.

It was the sound of a boy screaming. 

_ Ciel. _

His first instinct was to worry for his safety, but he quickly realised that it must have been a nightmare. He hadn’t expected a robot to even  _ have _ nightmares - after all, what benefit did programming a robot to be able to dream have? But he kicked the duvet away urgently, shooting up and rushing towards the lounge all the same.

He emerged into the lounge to see Ciel squirming around in the dark red blanket. The skin of his face was sodden with tears, and his eyes were all scrunched up. His beautiful silky blue hair was completely wet with a sweat-like substance, so much so that it had turned almost black where it splayed out across the cushion.

“No!  _ No! _ Get off… Get… Get  _ off me! _ ” He cried, synthesised voice broken to the point that he almost sounded like some sort of tiny animal roaring.

Sebastian rushed to his side, and knelt down by the sofa as he attempted to pull him out of this terrible episode. Above all, he made sure not to touch him.

_ “Ciel,”  _ he urged. “Please wake up.”

He realised he probably should have put at least a T-shirt on, what with the nature of Ciel’s trauma, but he had only just woken up and all he could clearly think to do was to  _ help him _ . He noticed that his own heart was beating fast. In fact, it was beating so hard that he could feel his own pulse thrumming in his neck. 

From what Vincent had said, he gathered that it would be quite a spectacle when he eventually had a panic attack. However, he hadn’t expected to be quite so personally affected. He had to admit that seeing him struggle and scream was utterly heartbreaking, even for him. Sebastian did not consider himself to be at all empathetic; he could not muster any true feeling of sadness when he heard of people dying in the news, nor was he affected when characters in films suffered great losses. He could never understand why people cried when they saw other people that they didn’t even know crying. But seeing that poor, weak thing falling apart on his settee - he was shocked to find himself caring. It was an extremely peculiar feeling, and it was not one that he would ever like to experience again.

“Ciel,  _ please _ wake up,” he urged again, loudly this time. He was cautious not to be too loud or sharp about it, just in case being startled awake would only make matters worse. Ciel whined, heaving for breath as he slowly came around. “It’s me, it’s Sebastian. You’re safe now - see? You’re at my apartment, Chérie’s here, and everything’s safe. It was just a bad dream. You’re safe now.”

Ciel’s eyes blinked open, and he looked up at Sebastian beside him, shining pink lips wet with a saliva-like substance where his mouth had struggled to accommodate his panicked breathing. 

“Sebas…?” He almost said his name for the first time, Sebastian noted, but didn’t quite make it to the end. Ciel looked around, shivering, slowly coming to awareness as he acknowledged his surroundings. However, his breathing was still coming in so harshly that his throat was making a high-pitched wheezing noise. It sounded painful. After a few moments of simply breathing, he looked back up at Sebastian. Then, the more he stared into Sebastian’s dark concerned eyes, his eyebrows slowly drew closer and closer together, after which his quivering pink lips pursed together to keep from trembling. And then - he began to  _ wail. _

His pursed lips burst open, and a huge sob was released into the silence of the apartment, echoing. Huge tears trailed down his already-sodden cheeks, and sobs wrecked his overworked voice box. He brought his fingers up and shakily tangled them into his damp fringe, angling his head down so that Sebastian couldn’t see him crying.

“Ciel -,” Sebastian began, at a loss. If it were someone else, he knew the right thing to do was to soothe their back, and make them feel physically safe while they let it all out. With Ciel, he had no idea what the right thing to do was. “What’s wrong?”

It was a foolish question to ask. Of course, Ciel was in no state to reply, and he simply cried harder. He sobbed, and wailed, and cried, and cried, and cried.

Sebastian, feeling utterly useless, rushed to grab Chérie from where she had been sitting on the lounge rug, looking mightily perplexed about the whole situation. He placed her with Ciel on the sofa, and luckily she didn’t simply run off again. She curiously approached Ciel from up the side of the sofa, and clambered over his legs until she could peer at his face in concern. If Sebastian couldn’t comfort him, perhaps she could. 

Ciel, still in the midst of wailing, did bring one hand down from his hair, to thread it into Chérie’s fur instead. She let herself be grabbed onto whilst he used her as an anchor into reality, obviously sensing that something wasn’t right with him at all.

“See, Chérie’s here for you now. You might think she’s weird, but she already cares about you a lot,” Sebastian supplied, hoping that he was still listening despite all the tears. Next, Sebastian grabbed the box of tissues from the coffee table, and could do nothing but offer the box to him next to his head as if he were some kind of servant. “Here are some tissues if you need them.”

Ciel made no obvious sign that he had heard Sebastian, but unexpectedly, he reached out and whipped a tissue from the box without even looking at him, and he tremblingly wiped his nose and his eyes of all the fluids that had built up there.

“There you go. We’ve got you,” Sebastian said calmly. And sure enough, holding Chérie like a lifeline in one hand, and covering his face with tissues in the other, Ciel eventually quietened down. His breathing was still shaky, as was his entire body as it shivered in cold sweat - but eventually the wails turned to hiccups, and the hyperventilating turned to miserable sniffing.

Sebastian then caught sight of the next problem. Ciel was not only drenched in ‘sweat’; he noticed a large dark wet spot that had spread over the bottom half of the red blanket. Not really thinking, Sebastian lifted up the blanket to confirm his suspicions that yes, Ciel’s tiny shorts were completely soaked, and the sky-blue sofa cushion underneath him had turned a sort of grey colour. There was the bedwetting problem that Vincent had only barely warned him about. 

“Ah,” Sebastian said, already thinking of how on earth he was going to clean the cushion, more than anything else. 

Ciel, noticing what Sebastian had seen, began to panic all over again. He gasped, mortified, and scrambled to draw his knees up and hide the blanket desperately. His small features were cast over with terror, and his breathing was picking up as if he might start crying again at any second. Knees pressed to his chest, eyes wide in fear, he tried to conceal all of the wet patches. It was a fruitless effort, for now he had only completely exposed his bottom to Sebastian, leaving next-to-nothing to the imagination. Sebastian awkwardly drew his eyes away, knowing that’s not what he had meant to do. He could ogle at his sweet round balls in wet shorts at some other time when he wasn’t in the middle of a panic attack, hopefully.

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry, I promise I didn’t mean to - I didn’t know I would -”

_ “Shhh,”  _ Sebastian hushed him, sending his pretty voice silent. “I’m not angry with you. I know you were scared.” Plus, the liquid didn’t even smell of anything. It was probably just the water that he’d drank last night. Sebastian really shouldn’t have said anything - he could have easily dealt with it once Ciel was feeling comfortable again. 

Ciel sniffled.

“You’re not… angry? You won’t shout at me?” he said meekly, eyebrows upturned in disbelief. He was still all curled up as if he were protecting himself, his mind completely focused on not becoming prey again for those who might hunt him.

“Of course not. It wasn’t your fault, Ciel,” Sebastian assured him. Ciel’s pink lips fell apart - he looked at Sebastian in some sort of shock, gawping as he stared straight into his eyes. It was such a direct stare that Sebastian felt somewhat uncomfortable. He’d never seen that kind of expression on his face before. That intense stare then fell onto Sebastian's naked torso, roaming his bare skin, and suddenly Sebastian was feeling far too underdressed in his own home.

“What is it?” He finally asked, unable to brush away the itchy feeling of being judged by a little boy. Ciel looked away, all bashful and pursed lips.

“It’s just… you’re…” he trailed off shyly. “It’s nothing,” he said eventually, sending a sidelong glance at Sebastian.

“If you say so,” Sebastian replied, eyes narrowed. “We’ll need to put your clothes into the washing machine, as well as the blanket. I’ll try to wash the sofa cushion too. My clothes will be absolutely huge on you, but you’ll have to put up with it just for today, if you don’t want to go around naked.”

“...Okay,” Ciel agreed, and then swung his legs over the edge of the sofa. He hauled himself up and tried to stand, but his legs gave out immediately. He sank to the floor in between the sofa and the armchair, faunish legs all bent up underneath him. Sebastian rushed to his side, but stopped short when he realised that there was nothing he could do to help. If only he could just  _ touch _ him.

“Ow,” Ciel complained, rubbing at his own trembling thighs as he toiled for control over his breathing. “It’s always like this…”

He must have been referring to the times that Vincent had told Sebastian about; when he became sickly and weak, and achy all over. At the time, Sebastian had been intrigued and keen to see what it was all about, bewitched by the idea of a tiny thing who needed to completely depend on him for strength. But seeing it happen before him now, he could only think how much he wished he could comfort the boy. What he saw before him wasn’t a fault-ridden android - he was a sickly child who was plagued by sexual abuse. Vincent had really fucked up whatever codes he’d written that let him become so broken.

“Don’t worry, I’ll be on cleaning duty. Get up onto the armchair, and I’ll run you a bath and bring you some fresh clothes, alright?” Sebastian offered his arm to Ciel once again as he gestured to the armchair. Ciel eyed the large hand, and even seemed to consider it for a moment, eyes darting between the outstretched arm and Sebastian’s face - but then held up a hand to refuse him as usual. Sebastian gave him an awkward smile, leaving him to gather his own body strength. “Be careful.”

Even slower than usual, Ciel cautiously manoeuvred himself until he could grab onto the arm of the chair, and shakily hauled himself up onto the seat. Sebastian breathed a sigh of relief. He was safe and sound once again. 

After sipping at a glass of cold water and calming himself down, the shakes had subsided enough that Ciel felt able to walk to the bathroom. In spite of everything, really, he was being a very good boy. Sebastian didn’t have to tell him anything twice. He cautiously padded over to the bathroom with Sebastian at his side just in case he fell again, and he had no qualms about taking a bath, as long as Sebastian wouldn’t be in there with him. Sebastian set the bath to run automatically, and then drew the curtain over the side where the tub was, leaving Ciel to himself.

“Just leave your dirty clothes there - I’ll get you some clean ones for you to change into once you’re done. Soap’s on the side of the tub. Shout for me if you need me, okay?” Sebastian called through the curtain.

“Okay,” came the smooth reply, and Sebastian could hear little ‘hmph’s of effort whilst he presumably struggled to undo the buttons on his shirt. How adorable.

Next, Sebastian returned to the lounge to deal with the mess. He stripped the sofa of the once-light-blue cushion and picked up the sodden blanket. The blanket could just go straight into the washing machine, so it only took him a few seconds to walk down the corridor and dump it in the utility room. However, the cushion was soaked the entire way through, and it was too big to go in the machine; he was going to have to clean it in the bathtub once Ciel was done. He chucked it in the bathroom, then promptly went to his bedroom to seek out a T-shirt small enough that it wouldn’t completely hang off Ciel’s shoulders and fall down. He had a My Chemical Romance shirt that he’d bought at their 2007 tour, long before he’d started going to the gym, and it was far too small for him now, but he’d kept it for sentimental purposes. It was about the best he had for a boy who was more than a foot shorter than him, as well as half his weight. 

Bottoms, however, proved to be more of a problem. Any trousers, tracksuit bottoms, or shorts that he owned would all absolutely swamp Ciel’s small frame, and probably fall right off his narrow hips. Not that Sebastian didn’t want to see him try - but it was probably not very courteous to purposefully set things up just so he could see him struggle. Yet. 

The T-shirt would probably work as a dress anyway, and tightly elasticated boxers would probably function well enough as shorts. A flash of excitement crossed his chest as he realised that his own underwear would be rubbing up against those wonderful milky thighs, and pressing into the tiny cock that Sebastian had seen through his bunched up little shorts. He shook himself - he wholly disliked the fact that this boy made him feel like a schoolkid with his first ever real crush. Then again, he already knew that he was utterly soft for the cursed robot.

He placed the fresh clothes on top of a white chest of drawers in the bathroom, and took a moment to listen to the little splish-splashes where Ciel was moving about in the water.

“I’ve put fresh clothes on top of the drawers here, okay?” he called through the curtain once more.

“Okay.”

“I’ll shut the door now, so you won’t have to worry about me walking in on you whilst you’re indecent,” he said, backing out of the bathroom.

“Okay,” Ciel replied again, and Sebastian gently closed the door behind him with a soft click.

There was a certain warmth coursing through him. Despite all the kerfuffle, Ciel was beginning to settle in. Beginning to trust that Sebastian wouldn’t force him to his weak knees and make him do unsavoury things. Perhaps he had such a terrible dream that night  _ because _ he was now in a safe place; he could get out all the tears, all the anxiety, and  _ scream _ with no consequences to speak of. The whole thing was troublesome and worrisome - but Sebastian found himself willing to be there for him. It was an odd sensation, and perhaps he felt slightly ashamed that he’d only ever harboured such emotions towards cats before - and now, a robot. At times, Sebastian doubted whether he was truly human. He had never known his parents, after all. Perhaps he’d been dumped on Earth by some heartless demon.

Sebastian collapsed on the armchair with a sigh, exhausted. He really needed a break, so he reached for his book on the coffee table. It was a mediocre mystery novel, and it wasn’t good for much more than mindless entertainment, but it was a rather interesting read all the same. Only, as soon as he began to read,  _ it  _ started. The  _ meowing. _

Seeing that her master was now fully available to divulge his undivided attention, Chérie ran over to where Sebastian sat, and dug her sharp claws into Sebastian's pyjama-covered calves. Of course. It was nearing breakfast time by now. 

Sebastian pinched the bridge of his nose. His apartment had turned into a nursery; he hadn't been permitted a single moment to just relax ever since Ciel had arrived last night.

"Anybody would think that you're starving," he sighed, leaning over to tickle Chérie's neck. She nuzzled against his large hands, purring. "I haven't eaten since last night either, you know."

He dutifully cut his moment of well-deserved rest short and returned to his role of caregiver, going to dig cat food out of the kitchen cupboard. Chérie was spoiled, as well as a brat, and she would only settle for a singular brand of cat food that would have been unaffordable to Sebastian a few years ago. He tore the sachet apart and emptied the food into her bowl. She gratefully stuck her head straight in, licking at the sauce-covered pieces.

Watching her, Sebastian was alerted to his own appetite. He wasn't a big breakfast-eater, but he often went for as much as a croissant. He put a few out on the coffee table along with some spreads, just in case Ciel was feeling hungry too. Then, he showered in his ensuite, and promptly put on a black jumper and some black jeans so that his naked body wouldn't offend Ciel at all.

He had gone through the motions of his entire morning routine, Chérie had finished her breakfast, Sebastian finished his breakfast, he read a chapter of his book - and Ciel  _ still _ wasn't out of the bath. He must have been in there for almost an hour, and Sebastian was beginning to worry. He was just about to cut his cuddle-time with Chérie short to go check on him, when he heard the water begin to drain out the plughole.

_ So he's alive. That's good. _

Or just as not-alive as he ever was, more accurately.

Eventually, Ciel emerged from behind the bathroom door, and stood at the lounge doorway looking wet and rather sorry for himself. However, the pitiful look on his face did not deter from the precious sight before Sebastian’s dark eyes. The My Chemical Romance shirt hung loosely around his neck to expose the delicate skin around his collar bones, and it was long enough on him that the hem didn't come to an end until his mid-thigh. The boxers couldn't even be seen beneath it. Seeing him like that brought a severe sense of possessiveness upon Sebastian, and he thought that he so desperately wanted to hold Ciel. And perhaps sneak his hands up the back of those delightful boyish thighs. He quickly set the thought aside for a later date.

"Everything okay?" Sebastian asked, peering at his downcast expression. "You took a long time."

"It takes me a while to do things myself," he explained, biting his lip. "I don't feel well."

"Why? What's wrong?" Sebastian asked, putting Chérie aside so that he could stand to attend to the boy properly.

"I have… no visual input from my right eye," he began, pointing to it. "And it hurts."

Sebastian's brow furrowed, pacing over to Ciel and kneeling down to peer into his face.

"Can I take a look?"

To his surprise, Ciel nodded shallowly, timidly bringing his hand away from his right eye so that Sebastian could see. Sebastian shuffled even closer on his knee, and peered up into that gorgeous eye - only, when looking at it properly, he could quickly tell that something was wrong. Firstly, it was wonky, looking slightly off-centre where it should have been in sync with his left eye - it just didn’t sit right within the eye socket. At first, Sebastian thought that it might have become dislodged, but then he noticed something. A gloopy white substance was caked around the edge of his eyelid, seeming to have leaked from his eye.

It had melted.

“Oh my, Ciel, what’s happened to you?” Sebastian cooed, looking sadly at the melted plastic.

“Why? What is it?” Ciel replied quickly. He recoiled from the gaze, anxious.

“Can you tell me how hot your internal temperature became during your panic attack?”

His left eye flicked upwards for a moment, appearing to think as he combed through the data.

“120 degrees Celcius. Is that bad?” Ciel asked, lips pursed nervously together.

“God, no wonder,” Sebastian said with a sharp intake of breath. “The plastic in your eye melted. We should take it out just in case it happens again, or else all your connections will get all sticky. Ah - if it’ll be painful, perhaps you should power off…”

The prospect of being completely unaware of his surroundings or what might be happening to him seemed to make Ciel visibly anxious; he gave Sebastian a wide-eyed look before shaking his head vehemently.

“If you’re going to do it, I’d rather be around. Just… be gentle,” he said shyly, now avoiding all eye contact with Sebastian. Sebastian tried not to imagine him saying the same thing in another situation entirely, and failed miserably. It was Vincent’s fault for making someone so sickeningly adorable. Cursèd engineer.

“Yes, of course,” Sebastian smiled, leaning inwards. “Stay still, alright?”

Ciel took in a deep breath through his nose and held it, bracing himself for what was to come. Sebastian felt remorseful, and rather unsure. Generally, he didn’t make a habit out of grabbing little boys’ melted eyes.

Gently, Sebastian placed his left palm around the back of Ciel’s head. His beautiful, shining hair had a silkiness that rivalled even Chérie’s fur. He didn’t know what material it was made out of, but it was absolutely wonderful to the touch, even when damp. Ciel flinched at the contact. Most likely, he was nervous to be touched by Sebastian for the first time. However, he was brave, and didn’t move away - although his eyes were now all scrunched up in fear, still holding his breath.

“I can’t do it if your eyes are closed,” Sebastian said softly, an endeared smile on his lips.

“Oh,” Ciel said in realisation, embarrassed as he let his eyes spring open again. He tilted his head backwards into the hand behind his head, nervously chewing at his lips as he willed it to be over and done with. Like an untrusting abandoned kitten, he remained cautious of the new owner, but eventually decided to let himself be completely at Sebastian’s mercy, understanding for the first time that perhaps not all humans were out to hurt him.

It was an easier job than expected. Sebastian had expected it to get stuck, and for there to be tears and all - but it must have already become disconnected from where it had melted, and it all but fell into Sebastian’s hand as soon as he touched it. Ciel made an urgent yelp of distress, complaining of pain - but it was already over.

“Done,” Sebastian said, holding the disfigured plastic up in front of Ciel’s good eye. Ciel sighed a heavy sigh of relief, and Sebastian allowed himself to ruffle the boy’s hair before retracting his hand. “Good boy. That was easier than expected.”

“Apart from I’m blind in one eye,” Ciel complained, crossing his bare arms grumpily. Sebastian chuckled.

“Yes, that is a concern. Unfortunately, I expect I’ll have to arrange for repairs with Vincent,” he said, kissing his teeth. Vincent definitely wouldn’t be pleased to hear that he was going to have to fork out company funds to repair the eye. Although, Sebastian wouldn’t let him forget that it was the fault of his  _ own _ programming that he was even able to have panic attacks and overheat in the first place. Ciel’s pouty face fell upon mentioning the name. Sebastian cleared his throat.

“Let me get you something to cover it,” Sebastian continued. Honestly, it was slightly unsettling to look at an otherwise completely human-looking boy and be able to see wires protruding through one of his eyes. Of course, he was still exceedingly cute, but Sebastian thought it best to let it be covered, especially with the danger of dust building up in there. He set the half-melted eye on the sideboard so that it was ready to be handed back over to Vincent, and then went to the bathroom to retrieve some gauze and surgical tape.

Ciel obediently remained as he was, and he looked up at Sebastian expectantly when he returned with the bandages. This time, Sebastian let him keep his eyes closed as he bent down and peered into his face. Ciel’s sweet button nose was right in front of him, and a sudden urge to plant a kiss on the tip of it grasped Sebastian’s thoughts for a moment - but he successfully brushed the impulse aside, carefully pressing gauze over the faulty eye as he tore off a piece of tape. This time, Ciel didn’t flinch at his touch. Quite the contrary - he appeared to be rather calm and comfortable in his hold. Sebastian claimed it as his own little victory, a cocky smile on his lips as he taped the gauze to the soft skin above his eyebrow and over the bridge of his darling little nose.

“There. You’re all patched up,” Sebastian said, his handiwork completed. Thus, Ciel was back to being just an extremely pretty boy, showing little evidence to give the fact that he wasn’t human away. 

He eyed Sebastian with his remaining good eye sheepishly, and looked at him expectantly, as if he was about to say something. Sebastian waited, rolling the gauze back up in between his fingers, and then looked back at Ciel again when the words he had been expecting were still left unsaid. His expression was so full of  _ something _ , just bursting at the seams, but unable to make its way past the barrier of his parted lips.

“What?” Sebastian raised an eyebrow. Once again, Ciel tore his azure gaze away, embarrassed.

“Nothing,” he murmured, ashamed to be caught. Sebastian was hoping that maybe he would get to hear a little more of what was on his mind, but if he was feeling well enough to give him cheek, then that was a good sign. All that was on his mind would overflow at some point, and Sebastian would be the one to catch it all.

“I won’t keep asking, you know,” Sebastian smirked. “If you want to tell me something, then-”

“I have to say it, I  _ know, _ ” Ciel retorted, scowling like a child being scolded. Sebastian laughed. He wasn’t really all that bothered about it; he was entirely within his right to keep secrets, and he could choose to say or not say whatever he liked. However, Ciel was pitifully easy to read, and judging by the way he kept stealing embarrassed glances at Sebastian, Sebastian was quite convinced that Ciel was having to come to terms with the fact that he was having feelings of gratitude for the first time. It wasn’t that Sebastian didn’t know why he kept fiddling with the hem of the shirt he’d borrowed, or why he kept opening his mouth only to close it again - Sebastian just wanted to hear him say it, loud and clear.

He put the first aid kit back in the bathroom cupboard, and then took a moment to scowl at his phone as he thought about how on Earth he was going to explain the situation to Vincent.

“Ciel,” he began as he walked back to where Ciel stood. “I’m just going to call Vincent, so get comfortable and have some rest. There are some clean blankets behind the armchair if you want one.”

“No, I-...” a small hand grabbed at the hem of Sebastian’s jumper, taking him by surprise. Sebastian stopped dead in his tracks, wide eyes blinking as he looked over his shoulder to see Ciel’s brow overcast with a sad expression. He seemed to be mulling something painful over, one despondent eye trained on the floor, lips downturned. Ciel quickly kept himself in check, however; the small hand grabbing at Sebastian was gone as quickly as it had come. There was a certain shame in that eye.

“I mean…” he gathered himself before looking up to meet Sebastian’s gaze. “Do you have to?”

Ah.

Obviously, Ciel was not keen on the prospect of Vincent being around again. He wasn’t exactly scared, no - his expression erred much more on the side of sorrow. Seeing that expression, Sebastian doubted that Vincent had ever directly inflicted damage on the boy. Not to mention, Sebastian was aware that despite his demeanor, Vincent was unexpectedly rather submissive when it came to sex. He had firsthand experience, after all. It was safe to assume that whatever Ciel thought of Vincent, he had some negative associations with him rather than direct trauma.

“Nobody else has the resources to repair your parts, poppet. I’m sorry,” Sebastian said remorsefully, fighting the urge to bring a palm up to cradle the top of his head. Ciel’s gaze was drawn towards the floor a second time. He appeared to be troubled with yet more thoughts, eyebrows furrowed and wringing his fingers over and over until he suddenly piped up again.

“Can I ask you something?” he blurted out. 

“What is it?” Sebastian raised an eyebrow, keen to know what could possibly be distressing him so much.

“Are you gay?”

Well. Sebastian had mulled over a few different scenarios, but admittedly, that was not one of them. He peered into Ciel’s face and saw him completely serious, an utter determination in his good eye. Sebastian spluttered, attempting to keep his laughter from falling into the open air.

“Why are you asking that now?” Sebastian said, voice strained, struggling to keep a straight face.

“Stop  _ laughing. _ Just answer the question,” Ciel huffed, annoyed. Sebastian wanted to kiss the irritated pout on his lips.

“Yes, I am,” Sebastian conceded, still smirking. “Is it that obvious?”

“It’s just that… when I think of how Vincent spoke about you, and how you speak about Vincent, I just wondered if…”

It must have been the most Ciel had ever spoken to him all at once. Sebastian was rather riveted. Although he would have been lying if he said he wasn’t slightly intrigued as to what on Earth Vincent had told the boy about him. 

“If…?” he prompted.

“If you fancy him,” Ciel finally supplied, looking rather downtrodden about it all.

If it wasn’t too rude to think, Sebastian remarked to himself that Ciel was utterly adorable when sad. If Ciel were willing, he would already be showing him physically, that without a shadow of a doubt, Vincent was in  _ no way _ the object of his affections. Those pink sulky lips deserved to be kissed, and his trembling faunish thighs deserved to be grabbed between warm hands.

“Not at all,” Sebastian supplied gently, smiling an amused smirk. He brought a hand to his chin, looking down at the boy with his head inclined to one side. “Not anymore. We did date, but that was years ago. Plus, it lasted no longer than a couple of months.”

Ciel looked relieved to hear it, peering at Sebastian from beneath his eyelashes with a somewhat hopeful expression sitting there. 

“Really…?” he hedged. 

“Yes, really. You don’t need to worry about any competition; my attention is wholly on you,” Sebastian added, grinning as his gaze settled fondly on him. Ciel’s cheeks immediately lit up with a bright red glow, his eyes widening at the accusation.

“Th-that’s!” his tiny fists curled up as he floundered, embarrassed. “That’s not what I meant by asking!”

He wasn’t all too convincing.

“Of course. How rude of me to be so presumptuous,” Sebastian smiled. Ciel crossed his arms, feigning irritation. 

_ Cute, cute, cute. _

He let Ciel be, offering him the croissants on the table and turning the TV on for him. Now, all that was left was to admit the situation to Vincent. He sat down at the computer, accessed the file that he’d encrypted last night, and irritably keyed the numbers into the dial screen of his phone. He tapped each one with a harsh jab to the touch screen, displeased to be having to ask for his help so early on. If they’d made it so Ciel automatically powered off when reaching certain plastic-melting internal temperatures, then they wouldn’t be in this mess in the first place. Sebastian prodded the dial button, and brought the speaker to his ear with a sigh. The tone rang five times before Vincent’s even tone rolled through the receiver, low.

_ “You couldn’t be without me for one day? God, you  _ **_are_ ** _ clingy.” _

An immediate irritation coursed through Sebastian’s chest. His jaw clenched.

“Glad to hear you’re chipper,” Sebastian said, brushing Vincent’s teasing aside. “Trust me, I don’t want to be calling you either.”

_ “Yes, this had better be good. You’re interrupting a game of snooker.” _

“What was that you said about being too busy?” Sebastian quipped, unable to help himself. 

_ “We all need downtime, don’t we? I’m the one who should be jealous. I’m not the one who’s being employed to have mindblowing sex.” _

Sebastian immediately thought to the pile of washing, the screaming that woke him up early, and having to tiptoe around his own home. There was no way Vincent genuinely thought that this was an easy job; he had been the one to palm Ciel off onto Sebastian, after all.

“Well, neither am I, so fortunately the envy shouldn’t trouble you at all,” Sebastian rolled his eyes, even though Vincent wouldn’t be able to see him doing it. “I need to send off for some repairs. He overheated during a panic attack this morning, and the plastic of his right eye melted. I didn’t know until he started complaining that it hurt and there was no visual input.”

_ “An eye? For Heaven’s sake, Sebastian, those are expensive.” _

“I thought you’d say that,” Sebastian mused. “Then again, I’d say it is your fault for not preventing the overheating in the first place.”

_ “It’s a prototype, you know,” _ Vincent’s voice turned terse, most likely uncomfortable to have his work critiqued. _ “Plus, there’s no way we could have foreseen this problem. They’re built around sexual appeal and fetish-friendly learning systems. I never programmed them to freak out and overload just because someone was a little rough with them. All the rest have been fine.” _

“For now,” Sebastian added. If it happened with Ciel, then eventually, it would probably happen to the other four models too. “Anyway, I’ll let you know more on that once I’ve actually gathered conclusive data. Come retrieve the eye when you have time, if you’re not too busy with all those extremely important snooker games you’ve got going on.”

_ “No one likes a spoilsport, Sebastian,”  _ Vincent sighed dramatically. _ “But you’re in luck - I’m not as annoyed as I might be otherwise. I was planning to come over in a few days to collect some additional data we need anyway, so it’s actually rather good timing for something to have gone wrong. I’ll try to get it sorted out.” _

Sebastian had never met anyone else who could make him feel lucky simply because they weren’t cussing him out. Still, it wasn’t a particularly bad trait - it made talking to him interesting, especially since Sebastian wasn’t one to be personally offended by juvenile teasing.

“Wonderful. I take it you’ll be wanting the data I’ve collected as well?” He didn’t mention the fact that he hadn’t even made a start on gathering it, and he certainly didn’t mention the fact that it was because he felt woefully sorry for the pretty little thing.

_ “Naturally. I’ll be round on Friday afternoon,”  _ Vincent said, nonchalant. 

“Understood. See you then,” Sebastian moved to end the call, but was swiftly interrupted.

_ “Wait. I’ve made it so the call is untraceable, but I would appreciate it if you would delete this number from your call history all the same,”  _ he said, voice low and urging. Sebastian smirked.

“Will do.”

_ “Don’t call me again.” _

“Yes alright, I love you too. Bye-bye now,” Sebastian made sure to end the call before he could be outwitted in any way, and grinned wickedly at the phone.

Vincent often said things like that, things that might offend others - but Sebastian was rather certain that it was little more than a guise for the fact that he enjoyed Sebastian’s company. Besides, when he was truly angry, there was no mistaking it. Sebastian had seen multiple people fear for their lives as a result of Vincent’s wrath; there was a certain calm smile on his lips wouldn’t quite make it to his eyes, and in spite of the serene expression, there was a hair-raisingly deadly implication to his tone as he terrorised his prey. Sebastian was fortunate to have never done something that had left him on the receiving end of that wrath. Yet.

Now, the trouble was with how exactly he was going to collect this data without frightening Ciel to death. That was the last thing he wanted - not when Ciel was already beginning to trust him so soon. It was beneficial for everyone to upkeep a reputation as his partner, rather than his abuser.

As Vincent had so wished, Sebastian deleted the precious number from his call history. He walked back over to the lounge, expecting to see Ciel sitting in front of the TV in a daze once more, but instead, he was curled up in the armchair with Sebastian’s book in his hands. He obviously wasn’t used to being able to see with only one eye, as the book was pressed close to his nose, face stuck in between the pages. Sebastian raised an eyebrow. He then plucked the book from Ciel’s hands using the tips of his fingers, and whipped it away from him.

“Excuse me, I was reading that,” Ciel complained immediately, grabby little hands reaching up in the air in a futile attempt to reach it. Sebastian was far too tall; the hands only came about as high as his waist. 

“This is hardly appropriate reading material for a good little boy such as yourself,” Sebastian admonished him. “Full of graphic stuff. I wouldn’t want you to get upset by any of the violence or sexual misconduct.”

“I don’t care. It seemed interesting,” Ciel insisted, plopping back down on his knees, deeming his rescue attempt a failure. “I’ve had bad things done to me in real life. Reading about it in a book doesn’t come anywhere close.”

Sebastian had to take a moment to confirm that what he’d heard was indeed what Ciel had said. It was the first time he’d opened up about it at all. Ciel was directly admitting that he’d suffered abuse, rather than Sebastian having to infer what had happened to him via the strange ideas he had about everyday life. On top of that, Sebastian was surprised to hear him talk about the situation in such an eloquent manner - what good was teaching a robot the difference between fiction and reality? Why make a sex robot so intelligent?

“Doesn’t it remind you of what happened?” Sebastian pursued the offering he had been given. It seemed that Ciel had granted yet a little more trust to him.

“Not really,” Ciel played with his fingers as he spoke. “It’s different because it’s not about me. There’s enough distance.”

Sebastian let the words sink in. It was a very sensible approach, and Sebastian found himself wanting to draw Ciel into his arms once again. And this time, he thought to himself - why give a robot the capacity to heal? The same reason why he became broken in the first place?

“At first, you seem like such a weak little thing - but actually, you’re quite strong, aren’t you?” Sebastian said fondly.

Ciel said nothing; he simply blushed where he sat, avoiding Sebastian’s probing gaze. He shrugged. And for once, it wasn’t because he was indifferent and dissociated - he was clearly embarrassed to be complimented. It was a highly enjoyable expression to see on his sweet little features.

“Right - how does teriyaki salmon sound for dinner?” Sebastian said as he placed the book back on the coffee table, open to the same page in case Ciel decided to continue reading.

“Don’t know, I’ve never had it before,” Ciel said. It was an obvious fact to both of them; there was no need to say it, but somehow, it still felt good to hear. Sebastian was glad to listen to his wonderfully lyrical tone at any time, of course, but it was still a delight to have him interacting of his own accord, rather than staring into space.

“Ah, I thought not. But considering your sweet tooth, I think you’ll rather like it,” Sebastian said, sending him a cheeky glance. “It’s also one of my favourites, I have to say.”

There was a certain anticipation in Ciel’s gaze that Sebastian had never seen before, and Sebastian marvelled at it. Somewhere over the course of their time together, food had connected them - a symbol of Ciel’s abuse being replaced with homely affection. His silky hair slipped over his bad eye as he gave Sebastian a nod, unsuccessful in downplaying his anticipation.

  
  
  
  


Usually, when it was just Sebastian alone, he would cut corners with his culinary inventions - using powders instead of fresh ingredients for seasoning, cooking things in the microwave instead of the oven - but for Ciel, he wanted things to be special. He was exhausted from washing the sofa cushion, but honestly, cooking was never truly a chore for him. He chopped up some fresh garlic, and then some fresh ginger, and added it along with the soy sauce and melted brown sugar in the saucepan. He stood by as it cooked, simply appreciating the smell with a proud satisfaction. And when he looked over at Ciel, he was looking over the top of his book, whereupon their eyes met. Perhaps he was appreciating the fragrance of the sweet sauce too? Sebastian kept their eyes connected as he graced Ciel with a smile, then went back over to check on the salmon in the oven.

He also made some salad on the side - just some shredded vegetables with carrot-ginger dressing, although he wasn’t sure that Ciel would be keen on vegetables altogether. As for the aubergine from the last time he made dinner, it had been thoroughly cooked and drenched in sauce, so it was rather a different affair to raw vegetables. And famously, many people were not keen on them, especially kids. Or even if it was good, Sebastian doubted that he would get much more than the marvellous gleam in his eyes that he had been privy to yesterday. Nonetheless, even with those dulled reactions, he wanted to show Ciel that there was more to life than whatever had happened to him. But in the end, he needn’t have worried.

Upon the first bite of salmon covered in sauce, Ciel savoured the taste in his mouth, his eyes fluttering closed. For the first time, what could only be described as a smile crept onto his dainty pink lips.

“It’s delicious,” Ciel said eventually, smooth tone full of contentment. 

Not even the sugar-packed sauce was quite so sweet as that smile. Sebastian’s heartbeat picked up, and his gut turned, although he tried not to let it show on his face. Even so, he couldn’t suppress the satisfaction that came to him in return. To see Ciel, who had been so shaky, paranoid and full of trauma, to be able to let his guard down and smile so serenely was wonderful. Sebastian sat in awe of how lovely he truly was.

  
  
  
  
  


Alas, that sweet atmosphere eventually came to an end, just before bedtime. 

“The sofa cushion isn’t dry yet, so I’ll set the futon up in here, okay?” Sebastian said, walking towards the cupboard in the hallway. There was no response, but that wasn’t unusual - he simply gathered the futon up in his arms, and then dumped it on the lounge floor next to the sofa. Chérie immediately went and laid on it;  _ apparently _ , new things are more interesting to lay on even if they’re less comfortable than her own bed. Ciel, however, eyed it cautiously, biting at the corner of his lips as his concerned gaze remained trained on the floor. He looked worried.

“What’s wrong?” Sebastian asked gently, bending down to his level.

“I’m just…” a shaky breath escaped him. “Scared that I’ll have that same nightmare.” His knees were locked in place, not only scared about the nightmare, but also scared to admit it so openly.

“Ah,” Sebastian said, somewhat ungracefully. He wasn’t sure what he could do for a moment, wondering if perhaps it would be better if he just didn’t sleep at all. But in the long run, his battery would probably get tired out that way, plus it was no doubt tiring for him if he were to be ceaselessly conscious. Then, an idea came to him.

“You like sweet things, don’t you?” Sebastian asked. Ciel cocked his head, cute and confused, but then nodded. “Wait here a moment.”

It was no amazing culinary feat, but it was a dessert that had often comforted Sebastian when he was worried or couldn’t sleep, back when he was living in care homes. He poured out a mug of milk, then put it in the microwave for two minutes. Next, he retrieved a jar of honey from the cupboard, and drizzled it into the hot milk, stirring it as he went. After finishing the preparation, he swiftly went back over to where Ciel was perched on the arm of the sofa, and held out the warm mug in his large hand.

“There,” Sebastian offered. “I put a little cold water in it, so it should be just the right temperature for you to drink.”

Ciel cast the mug a suspicious glance for a moment, but soon reached out to take it in between his little palms. His hands shook so badly that Sebastian wondered if he might drop it, but the shakes seemed to subside a little along with the warmth of the ceramic under his fingertips. He put the rim of the mug to his lips, and stared down at the liquid until he was cross-eyed as he took a sip.

“What do you think? It’s warm milk and honey. It always calmed me down when I was young, so I wondered if it might do the trick for you, too,” Sebastian supplied. Ciel hummed, the noise of his voice reverberating through the empty space inside the mug.

“...It’s sweet,” he said simply, but Sebastian could tell by the way he stared so intently at the liquid and kept going back for more that it was doing its job just right. Sebastian perched on the frame of the sofa just beside him, and soon, comforted by the warmth, only Ciel’s fingertips trembled around the outside of the mug. They sat in silence together, the only sounds in the room being the little suckles of Ciel’s mouth against the edge of the milk, and Chérie cleaning her fur.

“All gone,” Ciel said finally, holding the empty mug out to Sebastian. He took it with a smile, and dutifully went to stack it in the dishwasher.

“Can I ask something?” Ciel piped up again as Sebastian walked back over.

“Of course.”

“Why were you scared when you were younger?” he asked.

Sebastian had to take a moment to remember why himself. He had never been outright abused by anyone in care homes - no more so than other children roughing each other up, and neglect by the carers. He had never been fostered - he was always far too disagreeable and scathing as a child, and was labelled an outcast by both children and adults. He went into a group home at sixteen, then university at eighteen. Abandoned not only at birth, but time and time again.

“Because I had no one to care for me, I suppose,” he admitted. A sad smile sneaked onto his lips; he’d never spoken about his past in a vulnerable manner to anyone ever, apart from Chérie. It was somewhat embarrassing for it to be to a robot, but still, it felt liberating.

“Didn’t you have parents?” Ciel blinked, staring at Sebastian with eyes so wide that it was as if he was seeing him for the first time.

“No parents,” Sebastian clarified.

“Me neither,” Ciel mumbled, looking down at his feet and poking his toes together. He looked thoughtful, pressing his lips to one side and shuffling his feet over each other. Perhaps the fact resonated with him - made him feel a certain camaraderie with Sebastian. And it was true that if Ciel was beginning to open up to him, then Sebastian owed it to him to open up in return. The two were much more similar than either of them would have ever thought.

“Right,” Sebastian said, standing up. “Shall we brush your teeth tonight?”

Ciel’s gaze alternated between Sebastian’s large hands hanging at his sides, up to where his face towered over him, and back again. His face surrendered to an anxious expression, and he tapped his feet together more insistently.

“...Maybe tomorrow,” he said finally. Sebastian hummed, slightly disappointed - but it was better than an outright ‘no’, even if he was still scared.

“Tomorrow then,” Sebastian conceded. “Alright, I’m going to bed then. Hopefully you’ll have a much calmer sleep tonight. Goodni-”

“Wait, please,” those grabby little hands shot out to clasp onto Sebastian’s jumper once more. He was completely vulnerable to them - he stopped immediately, giving the boy all his attention once more, waiting for him to speak. He kept his head directed towards the floor as he said it. “I don’t want to be alone.”

How sweet. Sebastian knew that it was only because he was scared, but yesterday,  _ Sebastian _ had been the one he was scared of, and he had seemed to want nothing more than to be alone. He was becoming clingy. Sebastian wondered whether what Ciel was hinting at was really what he wanted - it put Ciel completely at risk if Sebastian were to change his mind about ‘using’ him.

“Would you like to sleep in my bed with me? It is very large, so we won’t even have to sleep close to each other. I promise I won’t touch you.”

Ciel didn’t say anything, but he did nod shyly. Sebastian smiled. He wanted to cuddle him so desperately. (Although he had promised not to, of course).

“Come on then,” he said, walking off down the hallway with Ciel in tow.

As he stepped into Sebastian’s room for the first time, Ciel nervously looked left and right, surveying everything in there from floor to ceiling. It was dark in there, as it always was; Sebastian often had to do night shifts, so he had purposefully chosen his bedroom to be the one room without any windows. The walls were painted in a pale mauve, and the black carpet was plush under the feet. Again, Sebastian was a minimalist, so there wasn’t much more than a wooden wardrobe and chest of drawers, apart from a few books. In the middle of the room, there stood his king-sized bed, covered with rich dark purple sheets. And in the corner, there was a door leading to the ensuite - but otherwise, it was a room full of space and not much else.

“Get yourself comfortable, alright? Take whichever side you want. I’m just going to get ready for bed.”

Ciel stiffly walked over to the side of the bed as if his ankles were tied together, apparently unused to new environments. He clambered up onto the bed using his hands and knees, too short to simply sit down onto it. It was so cute that Sebastian almost commented on it, but the glare that Ciel shot at him after successfully getting up there told him that it would be wise not to.

He brushed his teeth and changed into pyjamas in the ensuite, not wanting to frighten Ciel with more nakedness. Once he finished his routine and was feeling sufficiently refreshed, he returned to the bedroom to see Ciel curled up under the covers, head engulfed by the plump pillow. Sebastian slipped into bed quietly on Ciel’s left-hand side, not wanting to wake him just in case he was already asleep. When Sebastian nestled his head into the pillow and closed his eyes, a small, shaky voice whispered next to him.

“I’m scared,” Ciel admitted in that hushed, weak tone. Really, there was nothing more that Sebastian could do - the best case scenario was that the night would go by with no upsets or bedwetting (hopefully his mattress protector could take it), and then he wouldn’t be scared anymore tomorrow night.

“It’s alright, I’m here,” Sebastian cooed in a low voice. “If you’re really scared, then you can hold my hand if you like.”

No reply came, and Sebastian simply shut his eyes again. About ten minutes passed, and he was just about drifting off to sleep when he felt a soft, baby hand wriggle into the palm of his own, and grab onto it. Sebastian couldn’t help but let out a quiet gasp - he hadn’t even humoured the possibility that he might actually take him up on his offer. He didn’t move a muscle. It was as if Ciel were a tiny bird of some sort; Sebastian wanted to keep him there with him, but didn’t want to frighten him away with any sort of sudden movement. Ciel’s little fingers trembled in his grasp, but he did not squeeze them or give him any reassurance. Sebastian knew how much courage it must have taken him, and he didn’t want to ruin it. But at least, he could feel how smooth Ciel’s skin was, and he was able take comfort in the warmth of his grasp and the texture of his skin as he drifted off to sleep.

And all through the night, right until Sebastian woke up, Ciel’s petite hand was still grasping onto those large fingers, his lifeline while he waded through a plague of traumatic memories.

  


  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [twitter](http://twitter.com/atsukunai)


	3. Vincent

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>   
>  please look at [this](http://twitter.com/queeniecrimson/status/1317673388568154113) wonderful art of Ciel for this fic!! I was so thrilled to receive it <3
> 
> warnings in this chapter for a couple of slightly forceful moments (no actual noncon, though)  
> 

Sebastian was aware that it was cruel.

He knew that doing this was inhumane, unethical, deceitful - whatever one would call it. But still, he needed at least _something_ to report to Vincent, or else, Ciel was as good as gone. He needed _something_ to convince that stubborn bastard that his shitty codes were what made it so easy to give a boy trauma.

Over the past few nights, the two had settled into a kind of routine. Ciel was improving more and more every day, even though he only allowed Sebastian to touch him when buttoning up his shirt - they were “far too fiddly to take care of alone” - and when helping him to brush his teeth. After the first time was over and done with, his jaw no longer trembled when Sebastian held his chin open between his thumb and forefinger, and he stopped complaining when Sebastian had to reach to get his molars at the back. Generally, he now tolerated Sebastian being in close proximity to him. And on top of that, there was the fact that they would slumber with their fingers entwined between them, a symbol of trust and solidarity uniting the two - although neither of them mentioned it. Ciel was of such a personality that if Sebastian teased him for it, then he would probably stop doing it out of sheer stubbornness. And Sebastian certainly didn’t want him to stop.

That was the thing. A far cry from the skittish, tiny sweetheart who constantly tried to keep his distance, Ciel had now become quite the clingy little thing. Wherever Sebastian went, he followed not too far behind, and he would even remark _‘you took your time’_ with a disapproving look on his face whenever Sebastian spent longer than twenty minutes in the bathroom. He framed it with displeasure, but it was clear that it was his own obstinate way of admitting _‘I was lonely, don’t leave me again’._

It appeared that Sebastian had adopted yet another clingy little kitten.

Winter was well afoot, and Ciel often kneeled on the window seat by the balcony while Sebastian trudged through his files. He watched how the dark smothering of clouds curled across the sky, one beautiful blue eye following the raindrops as they trickled down the glass and gathered on the window pane. The other eye, no longer there, was covered by a simple black eyepatch that Sebastian had bought when he’d gone out for groceries. But Ciel was so entranced by the simple passage of stormy weather and the people going about their lives down below that Sebastian wondered whether there had been no windows in the place they had been keeping him. Seeing how well he was doing, Sebastian thought it might be a good idea to take him on an outing somewhere and let him taste the outside world for the first time, even if it was just for shopping.

He hadn’t had any full-blown panic attacks since his nightmare on their first morning together, and on top of that, Sebastian was who he had come to trust to bring him out of that terrible, painful place. He was healing. His true, _brattish_ personality was shining brighter and brighter. He _smiled_ every day. That was precisely why Sebastian didn’t want to do this.

He was going to have to incite a panic attack on purpose.

It came around to Friday morning - the morning of the day that Vincent had arranged to come over. Ciel was now strong enough to hop up onto the tall stools at the kitchen table with no problem, and he was contentedly swinging his slim legs back and forth in the air whilst he munched on a pain au chocolat. Sebastian sat opposite him, quietly drinking his coffee while scrolling through his Twitter timeline. Most of it was doom and gloom, as always, although he did enjoy seeing Agni’s horse photos. He was visiting family in India, and apparently, they owned two horses, judging how eighty percent of his photos were of him and Soma riding the two side by side on multiple occasions. It was a nice distraction from what he was about to do.

“You seem moody,” Ciel commented, his swinging legs causing the chair to make an obnoxious squeaking against the floor. Sebastian didn’t dare to look up from his phone.

“Perhaps it’s because of that racket you’re making. It’s bad manners to be so wriggly at the table,” he said nonchalantly, giving nothing away.

“Whatever,” Ciel sulked, although he did stop with the chair-squeaking. 

Sebastian sighed, and pinched the bridge of his nose for a moment. He couldn’t leave it any longer, and it wasn’t like it would get easier.

“Ciel, I need to test your functions so I can tell Vincent how you’re doing. Don’t worry, I’m not going to touch you - I just want to ask you some questions. But we might have to talk about the bad stuff that happened to you. Just this once, I promise. Is that okay?” It all came out in somewhat of a garble, and it was rather unlike Sebastian to be so ineloquent. But really, truthfully, he was fond of the boy and did not want to cause him unnecessary pain.

Ciel gave Sebastian a puzzled look, and glanced him up and down. Seeing that Sebastian was very serious about the matter, his eyes turned nervous, and perhaps even… ashamed. It seemed like he wasn’t really thinking about possibly triggering flashbacks, but rather that he didn’t want to tell Sebastian what had happened because it would be humiliating to admit. When Ciel had first arrived, he had no sense of shame - only a deep-seated fear that it would happen again. In every single action, he had simply assumed that Sebastian would take advantage of him. He had been empty and afraid, so much so that he was past the point of shame. Hence, even though it didn’t sit quite right for him to be ashamed of it, it was still, in a strange way, progress.

“...Do I really have to?” Ciel asked, eyebrows upturned. Sebastian gave him an apologetic smile.

“I dislike asking you to do this as well, as a matter of fact. But I promise I won’t judge you in the slightest. I need to record your thought processes on the matter so that none of your brothers will end up being frightened in the same way you were, alright?” Sebastian tried to be as gentle as he could muster.

Ciel deeply considered the matter. His ankles curled around each other underneath the table, and his toes curled up. He wrung his own slender fingers with a nervous grasp.

“...You say it’ll help the others?”

“Yes,” Sebastian assured him. “That’s why I took you in in the first place, you know. To find out how to stop you feeling so afraid. I never thought I’d get quite so attached to you, though.” He shot Ciel a devilish smile, to which his cheeks burned a bright pink. He turned his head away to fixate his stare on Chérie where she was cleaning her fur atop the sideboard, but the look on his face was all Sebastian needed to know that he was secretly delighted with the sentiment.

“Fine,” Ciel conceded at last, although still clearly bothered by the concept of telling Sebastian about his darkest moments.

“Thank you,” Sebastian smiled. “If you’re finished with breakfast, then let’s get it over with.”

Ciel didn’t dare to look at him. Although, when Sebastian rounded the table and held out a hand for him to grab onto, he took it. His soft, pale hand was warm where it clutched onto Sebastian’s palm. Sebastian noticed - in Ciel’s moments of vulnerability, it was becoming more and more often that he would look to Sebastian for comfort, rather than viewing him as yet another potential threat. Of course, there were still times where he was wary of Sebastian, but underneath it all, there was a natural desire for affection and touch which was so ironically human. And Sebastian offered that to him. No matter his fears, Ciel remained incapable of completely suppressing that part of himself.

Ciel stood awkwardly, shuffling his bare toes into the white fabric of the rug in front of the computer. He waited there silently while Sebastian booted it up and logged in, the tap-tap of the keys filling the open quiet.

Sebastian was now rather familiar with the PXAI software, and it didn’t take long for him to enter Vincent’s cryptic access code and view Ciel’s current processes. Sebastian’s heart squeezed just a little when he saw the word “anxious” flash up among his active tasks. In a way, he felt like he was intruding on something he shouldn’t be - as if he were rummaging around inside somebody’s private thoughts. But in the end, Ciel was just a robot. An object. Just a pretty doll.

So why did it feel so wrong?

Ciel’s entire life was in Sebastian’s hands. He had been put in the position of some kind of fucked up God; a heartless God who controlled a boy’s very soul with the click of a mouse. Everything that made him who he was, what drove his every word, his every emotion - was all inside those files. If he edited them, Ciel would change. Using the program, he could make him do anything he wanted. And If Sebastian deleted the files, Ciel would just cease to be. It was a very frightening thought.

Seeing more flashes of “anxious” pass by on the screen, he tried to stop dwelling on the ethics of the power he had, and turned his mind back to the task at hand.

“Okay,” Sebastian said gently. “Don’t be too worried. I’ll still be here for you once it’s over, so I’ll make sure you’re safe.”

Ciel didn’t say anything; he merely glanced at him with ashamed eyes, but he did nod.

“Okay,” Sebastian breathed again, more for himself rather than Ciel this time. He thought to start it off with simple questions so he could see his regular kinds of responses, and create a control to pit against his ‘faulty’ processes.

“What’s your name?” he began. Ciel paused for a moment.

“Ciel… I guess,” he said, looking down at the floor in order to avert Sebastian’s gaze. Memory files from the date that they met flashed by on the screen, along with “embarrassed”. Sebastian suppressed a laugh.

“What’s the date today?”

His internal clock flashed by.

“The thirtieth.”

“Who brought you to me?”

“...Vincent Phantomhive,” he said with a sigh. 

  
  


Memory paths traced back to his recorded information about Vincent.

_Distaste._

Sebastian found himself wanting to laugh again.

“Where did he bring you from?” Sebastian said softly, not wanting to plunge him in the deep end all too suddenly. Ciel swallowed, now clearly uncomfortable.

“The… the company warehouse,” he admitted.

_No windows, then._

“What did you used to do when you were bored?”

Ciel blinked at him.

“I never got bored. I was grateful for every second they weren’t there,” he said, voice unsteady.

“...Why?” Sebastian chanced. Ciel looked up at the ceiling, his hands clasped together in front of his hips.

“‘Cuz… ‘cuz it hurt, and they… never listened to me,” he settled on.

The processes going through him started to flash by at a faster pace, memory files from a couple of months before Ciel came to Sebastian being opened one after another.

“What hurt?” Sebastian said, gritting his teeth as he tried to endure watching Ciel’s face fall. His breaths were coming shaky through his lips now, and his eyes were trained on an empty spot on the floor, not truly looking at anything.

“Do I have to say? It’s… dirty. I’m dirty,” he declared, eyebrows drawing together. Sebastian’s heart fell.

“I promise I don’t mind. Once you tell me, I’ll never have to ask again,” Sebastian urged. It didn’t please him to intentionally pick such a gorgeous boy to pieces like this. But it had to be done if Sebastian wanted a chance to spend any more time with him. As well as if he wanted a chance to stop Vincent doing such ethically questionable shit. 

Ciel sighed, steeling the little resolve he had.

“Sex. You know,” he said vaguely, initially hoping that he would get away with avoiding the full extent of the question. But Sebastian said nothing; he only cast him a sorrowful look, and waited for him to continue. Ciel inhaled deeply. “When they would do things like… like holding my jaw open while they… _used_ it, and someone else would hold my legs open, tight, so I couldn’t run away, not that there was anywhere I could run to anyway, and the bed was hard beneath my spine whilst they forced themselves inside, but there’s no point screaming, they said - no point screaming because this was what I was made for and always would be, and they’d put their hands over my neck and squeeze until I couldn’t breathe and th-... I…” his gabbled recollection of his past trailed off, clearly gasping for air. Sebastian’s chest grew tight as he forced himself to stay still, willing his heart to stop caring as tears welled up in Ciel’s deep blue eye.

“They just kept saying it and I believed it. I believed it. This is what I was built for and would never know anything else. I exist only to be fucked, mouth only good for being a cum dump, hands on my butt, on my chest, my thighs, my ankles, my-... my....” Tears spilled across his eyelashes. “They said my screaming is annoying but at least my hole gets tighter, my- I can’t- can’t breathe- get off… _get off!”_

He sunk pathetically to the floor, knees knocking together where he curled up and heaved for breath. His head was buried underneath his forearms, and he sobbed in between his struggle for breath, whatever he was saying now incomprehensible. Sebastian bit his own lip to stop himself from comforting the boy, and let him descend into an unspeakable despair. It was a horrible thing to let happen, but Sebastian forced himself to turn a blind eye for now, and instead turned his attention to the screen.

The tasks had gone completely wild. His system was attempting to open hundreds of memory files all at once, and his emotional responses ricocheted off of each other: _fear, pain, fear, pain, worthless, pain, fear, worthless, fear - OVERLOAD OVERLOAD OVERLOAD._

It seemed as though all of his normal processes, whether it be for his general consciousness or his bodily functions, had stopped working entirely. Instead, everything was concentrated on reading files and files of memory data, and the overwhelming amount of emotional output that came with them. In turn, his internal temperature was climbing higher and higher, his inner parts unable to be cooled by the usual mechanism of his breathing. From what Sebastian understood of PTSD, he couldn’t really see much of a difference in his response to what may happen in a real human brain. Everything in him was traumatised and trapped by those memories, and his body was struggling to keep up with the sheer emotional outburst - so much so, that they simply overloaded. 

As suspected, there were no problems with his AI. The problem was that it was too good. It was too human.

The allowance for him to be scared and feel pain in such a realistic way was the root of the issue. Sebastian supposed that many people out there were into that shit - they would want the robot to act scared so that they could enact whatever fantasy they had, which is why Vincent probably put it there in the first place - but obviously, he hadn’t accounted for the fact that these emotions change someone. They don’t just go away. Maybe because Vincent was incapable of feeling that way himself, he was unaware that this sort of thing was bound to happen.

He had all the data he needed. All that was left was to somehow, _somehow_ bring the broken boy on his lounge floor back to reality.

“ _Ciel,”_ he hushed, collapsing to the floor on his knees right in front of Ciel. “You’re here now. It’s Sebastian here - not whoever did those things to you. You’re with Sebastian and Chérie,” he said firmly. His hands reached out on their own accord to try to hold onto Ciel multiple times, and he had to stop himself each time. Ciel’s muffled sobs echoed within the gap between his thighs and his chest. Sebastian scrambled to get a hold on Ciel’s grasp of reality without actually touching him. “You’re safe with me now. I won’t let them hurt you ever again.”

_What am I saying?_

He knew he couldn’t promise such a thing. Once Vincent was satisfied with the results, he would be gone, possibly factory reseted, and perhaps the same thing would happen all over again. He had no right to say something like that. And yet he couldn’t help but say it - because that was what he wanted.

“You’re safe with me now,” he said lowly, urging Ciel to come back.

“Ch...érie…” his voice cracked, broken up with breathless crying, but Sebastian heard him well enough. 

“Chérie, come here,” he called out to where she was sitting on the sideboard, and she eyed them warily before deciding that on this occasion, she would bless Sebastian with her presence. She padded over to where they were crouched on the floor, and meowed sweetly as if to ask ‘what’s going on?’.

Ciel reached out with a shaky, tiny hand, and used the texture of her fur to ground himself in reality once again. She looked a little alarmed, turning to look at Sebastian with wide green eyes, but he simply smiled back at her to let her know it was okay.

Ciel was far quicker at pulling himself out of it than last time; it was only a few minutes before the shakes had subsided, and he began to sniffle in the absence of wrecked heaving and sobbing.

“Sorry,” he said, head still buried in his knees. 

“There, you’re okay,” Sebastian said, smiling even though Ciel couldn’t see it. “I’m the one who should be sorry. But it’s all over now. I shan’t ask you anything else about it ever again - not unless you ever want to talk about it and get it off your chest.”

He shook his head vigorously at that idea, but Sebastian had at least let him know that it was okay to do so in the future. That he didn’t have to be ashamed of it.

_The future? What future?_

Sebastian was really getting far too occupied by this boy. He was work. A project that he was temporarily in charge of for two weeks. And when Vincent reset his software, he would be gone.

_Gone._

So what was the point of helping him like this? What was the point of being mindful of his past? What was the point of teaching him how to be human? Was he doing all of this just so Ciel might allow him a quick fuck before he leaves? What was the point-

“—I appreciate that you… still didn’t touch me,” Ciel interrupted his whirling thoughts, snapping Sebastian right out of it.

They may not have had a future. But Sebastian realised for the first time that, by God, did he want one. He barely recognised himself. For the first time in his life, he wanted a connection with someone. A real one.

“Of course,” Sebastian replied, his aching heart fond. “And I appreciate that you let me do so now.”

It was unspoken between both of them.

_I trust you._

And somehow, Sebastian still hadn’t broken that trust by putting him through something so horrible on purpose. For once in his lonely life, he’d managed to do things right. What a miserable thought to have. Usually, his lack of friendliness and arrogant demeanor scared others away. Perhaps Ciel’s similarity to him put them both on the same wavelength, albeit one different to most people.

Ciel nodded, now daring to raise his head and sadly cast his eye over to Chérie where she sat beside him. He continued to sniffle, and wiped his nose on the sleeve of his white shirt. Sebastian eyed the gesture in disdain, but didn’t dare to scold him in such a vulnerable moment.

“I’ll make you some hot milk, alright? Sit down properly and take some time to relax before Vincent comes this afternoon,” Sebastian said, lowering his neck and attempting to catch his eye. Ciel’s eye turned up to look at him sweetly, shy from beneath his thick eyelashes.

“With honey?” his voice rose higher, pleading. Though Sebastian was well aware of how unangelic he was usually, he was so sweet in this moment that it pulled hard at his recently-discovered heartstrings. He chuckled, amused.

“With honey,” he conceded. He then stood up from their little gathering on the floor, and held out his hand towards Ciel, giving him the freedom to choose. After a moment of nervous deliberation looking between Sebastian’s hand and his own, he took it. Sebastian’s heart lurched as he gently pulled him up to a standing position. He then led him over to the sofa, and reluctantly let his little palm go as Ciel clambered up onto the cushions.

_Will you just let him go like that when Vincent wants him back?_

A small voice in the back of his head kept on bothering him. It would not stay quiet no matter how much Sebastian willed it to. The fonder he grew of Ciel, the more he was reminded of the fact that their relationship was temporary, and perhaps even his _life_ was temporary _,_ if you could call it a life.

It was that thought that spurred on a complete impulse decision in that moment. After printing out the data that he’d collected, Sebastian paused in front of the computer, still open on Ciel’s files. And before he could think about what a terrible idea it was, he opened up his harddrive, and started a backup of the files. Obviously, there was no way to do so without Ciel knowing; once the copying process started, Ciel raised his head to give Sebastian a puzzled look, to which Sebastian responded with a smile. That seemed to appease his suspicion, and he turned back around to beckon Chérie onto the sofa - most likely, he probably just thought it was just another part of the job.

Sebastian swiftly departed to the kitchen as if he’d done nothing at all - but as he filled up a mug with milk, the more he realised what a risky move this was. First of all, he was making a copy of something that wasn’t even legal to begin with, and more frighteningly, this was something that _Vincent_ would most definitely never allow. His livelihood would be in danger from two wholly different directions. It was a risk that wasn’t worth taking; even if this was ‘saving’ Ciel in the case of a factory reset, he wouldn’t be able to get his body back again in order to restore him. And on top of everything, there was the fact that _he was risking his livelihood for an inanimate object._

And so why wasn’t he cancelling it? Why? 

There was no logical reason to do this. No matter how much he didn’t want to lose him, this wouldn’t change anything. Sebastian was a pretty much powerless chess piece in the process of Ciel’s fate.

And yet he didn’t cancel it. He left it running, stirred a generous amount of honey into Ciel’s warm milk, and even made himself a cup of fresh ground coffee as a treat. He left it running, and sat next to Ciel on the sofa, shared a nervous smile with him (which Ciel still couldn’t return quite yet), then let their shoulders brush together as they watched inane TV in the comfort of each other’s presence. To his own dismay, with a sharp awareness of the endearing round face in his peripheral vision, he couldn’t help but leave it running.

  
  


About fifteen minutes into not-really-watching Antiques Roadshow and sipping on their steaming drinks, Ciel seemed to have grounded himself back in reality. However, there was a slight pout on his lips, seemingly engrossed in thought as he stared right through the television as if it wasn’t there at all.

“Can I ask you something?”

It had become a more and more frequent question over the past few days. It gave Sebastian great amusement to wonder what he’d come out with each time; so far, notable examples had been _‘do plants have feelings?’, ‘does Chérie know she’s a cat?’,_ and _‘do people die if they never have sex?’_. That last one had made him greatly suspicious of the sorts of ideas Vincent had operated on when writing their codes, but he supposed that it was pretty much a given if the robots were to… understand their role in human’s lives. Sebastian still didn’t agree with him doing so, though.

“Fire away.”

Ciel inhaled, and held the breath inside him for a moment.

“Do you want to fuck me as well?” Came the question. Ciel shyly peered down at his crossed feet once he said it. Sebastian blinked at him, perplexed.

This time, it was a question that took him truly off-guard. Was he still worried about that? Unlike a human, Ciel was usually very quick to process ideas and information. As his memories and knowledge were physically stored on a harddrive, rather than having to constantly rewrite neurons that were already inclined a certain way, he usually only ever had to be told something once. Sebastian reckoned that was why he had made so much emotional progress in only a week - but still, trauma was trauma. Perhaps the light at the end of the tunnel was still not quite within reach.

“Ciel, I promise I’m not going to take advantage of you. If I was going to do that, I would have already done it a long time ago,” he clarified, hoping he would finally get the picture.

“No, I know _that,”_ Ciel huffed. Sebastian’s eyes narrowed. If not that, then what? 

“I’m asking if you _want_ to.”

Sebastian swallowed dryly. Of course he _wanted_ to. But still, he didn’t want Ciel to think that he wasn’t completely safe in his care.

“I would never do anything without your express permission-”

“Are you going deaf, old man?” Ciel sulked, irritated now. “Do you _want_ to fuck me? Or maybe you think I’m disgusting for what I am?”

_Ah._ So that was what he was worried about? That his past and the nature of his being would make him undesirable, perhaps? Although, in all honesty, Sebastian could never completely read what was going on in his mind. But in the end, that was what made him all the more intriguing. His soul, albeit artificial, was a truly colourful thing.

Sebastian thought on it for a moment. What exactly did he want him to say here? He didn’t know, so he opted for the truth, only diluted.

“Of course I don’t think you’re disgusting, poppet. On the contrary. You know I’m extremely fond of you. And if you were to offer yourself to me, I would be lying if I said I wouldn’t be delighted.”

Sebastian wasn’t sure if that was what he’d wanted to hear or not, but the moment he said it, his cheeks flashed up in bright red. 

“O-Oh,” he stuttered in stark contrast to his crass confidence only moments ago, and suddenly found great interest in inspecting all of his own fingernails.

“But I still want you to know I won’t try anything on with you,” Sebastian made sure to add, although he couldn’t suppress a smirk upon seeing the utterly flustered expression on his face. Ciel chewed his lip.

“I know,” he said softly, the tips of his ears still flushed pink.

They sat in silence once again, until eventually, Sebastian suddenly felt a soft pressure against his shoulder. He glanced down in surprise to see the top of Ciel’s head nestled against him, and then the flutter of his eyelashes as he wearily struggled to keep his eyes open. 

“Tired?” Sebastian asked gently. Having a panic attack at the beginning of the day had probably sapped all the energy right out of him.

“Mnn,” Ciel replied sleepily, his eyes closing for good this time, breaths coming delicately between his parted pink lips. Sebastian resisted the temptation to press a kiss to the top of his head like he would Chérie. Still, he had not the heart to move away - not in such a rare, precious moment of physical touch. By now, Sebastian was already well aware of the sensation of Ciel’s hand against his own, as he was allowed to hold it while they slept; he was warm, but perhaps not quite so hot to the touch as a living being. And yet perhaps because this was the first time Ciel had initiated any kind of intimate contact, the pressure of him leaning up against Sebastian’s side was somehow so warm that Sebastian even found himself feeling a little sleepy.

Eventually, he was going to have to get up to make lunch, but Ciel deserved this moment.

  
  
  
  
  


The intercom started ringing a few hours after lunchtime, signalling Vincent’s much-dreaded arrival. Sebastian felt his jaw clench upon hearing it, his fingertips curling inwards against the bread dough he was kneading. At Ciel’s own request, Sebastian had promised to teach him how to bake, although it would be a lie to say the boy had any potential whatsoever. As expected of someone who had never so much as made a sandwich, his technique was all off, and his half of the dough was a lumpy mess. It was perhaps salvageable if Sebastian were able to physically direct his hands, but considering the delicate PTSD situation, he was wary of doing anything out of turn. 

Sebastian sighed at the prospect of confronting Vincent, steeling himself for the inevitable conflict that was bound to arise - both over the melted eye incident, and Sebastian’s findings on Ciel’s AI. 

“I feel the same, though probably for a much different reason than you,” Ciel said, peering up at Sebastian’s rigid expression. The nap appeared to have done its job, as Ciel was now back to his usual snarky self.

“He said something about getting some data from you, so unfortunately, you’re stuck with him just as much as I am,” Sebastian sighed, walking over to the intercom, brushing off his floury hands.

He pressed the ‘unlock’ button with a dig of his thumb, bringing the high-pitched trill back to a tense silence. Sebastian wasn’t one to get nervous; he would think of certain things as unpleasant or bothersome, but he couldn’t genuinely say that those thoughts ever affected him personally. Yet now, while waiting for Vincent to take the lift and knock on the door, Sebastian’s gut was warning him that this conversation was deserving of a prophetic sense of distress.

The sound of Ciel burying himself into a blanket on the armchair was amplified tenfold in his ringing ears. The apartment was warm despite its airy decor, but still, a shiver crept all the way from his wrists right through to his shoulder blades. His mouth was dry. His hands were clammy.

But Sebastian was an actor. Not by trade, but by character. 

Upon deciding that he would not be shaken by this situation, his face relaxed until it was completely neutral. It was easy; he had needed to put up pretenses and hide his true thoughts his entire life, so quashing those ugly feelings was child’s play. When three sharp knocks finally resounded on the wood of the front door, Sebastian didn’t even flinch. And when he pulled the door open to greet the man standing on the other side, he smiled. When Sebastian truly put his mind to it, not even Vincent’s sharp eye could tell that it wasn’t at all genuine.

“Fancy seeing you here,” Sebastian gave him an amused, lopsided smile as he opened the door. Vincent smirked in return, quickly shuffling inside in the way that he always did, as if an enemy were surely watching him. Sebastian no longer bothered with telling him he was sure that Nina next door would take no interest in Vincent being there whatsoever - especially since he wasn’t a woman. Sebastian had learnt this fact after she sheepishly turned up by his front door one morning after a colleague named Mei had been visiting, bashfully asking for her contact details.

“God, it’s bloody freezing out there,” Vincent said, rubbing his hands together in the warmth of Sebastian’s apartment. As quick as ever, his line of sight immediately landed on where the melted eye was placed on the sideboard, and he raised an eyebrow at it. “If I’d have known it was going to turn out like this, I would have installed a hand-warmer inside the eyeballs,” he sighed. “No matter. Hindsight is a wonderful thing, hm.” He said simply, reaching to take the eyeball of his own accord and quickly pocket it. Sebastian didn’t even have to address it himself.

“How long will it take to make a new one?” Sebastian asked.

“Oh, I don’t know,” he sighed, shrugging his thick grey coat off and hanging it on top of Sebastian’s. “A week, maybe. It’s probably not worth reinstalling it until he comes back to us anyway, so don’t concern yourself with it. Not that you should have let it happen in the first place. You’re just lucky you’re cute.”

Sebastian scoffed.

“What do you think I am? Psychic? As I said, if you hadn’t have allowed the system to have panic-like reactions, then it wouldn’t have happened at all,” he said bitterly. The way he attempted to shift the blame onto anyone and anything was a typical Vincent personality flaw.

“If you say so, mister professional,” he rolled his eyes along with an unimpressed smile, then swanned over to the lounge to assertively plop down on the armchair opposite Ciel. Ciel flinched, looking over at him with a vague look of disgust.

“That’s a rather charming eyepatch you have now. I might even be tempted to include one in the sale package purely for the aesthetic value,” Vincent pondered, putting his knuckles to his chin as he shamelessly stared down at him, giving him the once-over.

“I think I’d prefer being able to see with both eyes,” Ciel remarked scathingly. For a moment, Vincent was clearly taken aback, but the unwavering smirk returned to his mouth soon enough.

“Goodness gracious, he talks now? Not only that - he’s _lippy,”_ Vincent chuckled, turning his head back to Sebastian. “I suppose I shouldn’t be as harsh as I am on you, Sebastian. Seems like you _have_ actually made some progress. What did you do?”

Sebastian shrugged, turning his back to Vincent under the guise of going to put the kettle on. 

“Nothing, really. I assume he’s just used to me now,” Sebastian said plainly, dumping three teabags in a pot. “What are the others like, then?” It was something that had intrigued him for a while. How much of Ciel’s personality was pre-programmed? How had it developed?

“What you’d expect from a sex bot, really. Eager to please, seductive, charming - though other options are available. I guess this guy would work for someone who has a degradation kink. Feels like he’s calling me all sorts of names in his head, judging by his displeasure,” Vincent sneered. Sebastian couldn’t help but laugh at that; he was certain that was exactly the case. 

Vincent fell silent after that, no doubt intimidating the ever living daylights out of Ciel by giving him his infamous stare-down. Sebastian filled the teapot up with hot water, then grabbed three mug handles in one hand and carried the teapot with the other. He placed them down on the lounge coffee table, then went back for the milk. He knew how particular Vincent was with the colour it had to be, so he simply left it out on the table for him to deal with himself - although he did pour the right amount into Ciel’s mug, as he knew how prone he was to spilling things. Vincent raised an eyebrow at the gesture, almost unable to keep himself from coming out with a teasing remark. Sebastian shot him a glare which clearly said ‘shut up’, and he reluctantly backed away, folding his arms, his legs crossed.

“Well? I can tell you’re absolutely _dying_ to tell me where I went wrong with my life’s work. The report, please, sir,” Vincent smiled, the gesture not quite reaching his eyes.

This was what Sebastian had been dreading. Even back at university, Vincent had been notorious for being rather insufferable when it came to graded content. He was the sort of student who would write huge emails back to his lecturers, detailing every single way in which _their_ criticisms on the essays were wrong. The worst part was that Vincent was a clever man. He made good points in his retaliations, however his absolute obstinacy in accepting any feedback whatsoever made him extremely unpopular among their lecturers.

“If you insist,” Sebastian feigned nonchalance, calmly getting up and walking over to the print-out of Ciel’s data. In his anxious ears, he heard Vincent pouring out his tea. He triple checked that the sheet was showing the right thing. He took a deep breath.

“Here,” he announced, handing the piece of paper down towards Vincent. He sipped his tea in one hand, and took the sheet with the other, flicking it to straighten it out.

“There are no technical faults with his AI,” Sebastian stated, sitting back down. “Everything works perfectly. And that’s exactly why he’s having these troubles. The way the AI functions is too similar to a human brain; that’s why he managed to develop PTSD in the first place. The way his memories and emotions are interlinked make it possible to get triggered in the same way as a human. Even if you don’t know what that’s like.”

Vincent narrowed his eyes at Sebastian, shooting him a dubious glare across the top of the paper. But he didn’t retort at first; he momentarily looked back down at the data, and Sebastian watched with bated breath as he looked over the processes.

“You think this isn’t faulty?” Vincent eventually sighed. “Even if something did trigger bad memories for him, why would his entire system stop functioning properly? They should still be able to cope with both emotional response and physical maintenance.”

“It’s direct feedback from his emotional responses. The terror he feels while trying to properly process those memories is so strong that it simply overloads the system. As I say, it’s not a problem with the system itself. It’s the fact that he’s able to feel such negative emotions in the first place. I know it won’t please you to hear this, but if you want my professional opinion on how to stop this happening to the rest of the batch, then you need to simplify their emotional capacity and intelligence.”

“You’re right,” Vincent immediately interjected. “That doesn’t please me in the slightest. Surely, there’s something else that can be done to prevent an overload from happening. You have a creative mind, don’t you, Sebastian? I know you’ve programmed more complicated things than circuit breaker-type codes.”

“Even if I did, it wouldn’t matter,” Sebastian kissed his teeth. Irritation was starting to properly slip into his outer façade now, and he impatiently tapped his index finger against his elbow. “Even when not having a panic attack, he would be miserable, and not at all appealing to the client. He would still be unwilling and inanimate during sex, as well. Not everyone wants that.”

Vincent mimicked Sebastian’s look of irritation, and leant the side of his head against his propped-up knuckle.

“I can’t just remove the bulk of the work that we’ve been toiling over through these past couple of years. It’s our main aim. To be able to have a real sexual encounter without requiring a real person. Making the robots’ interactions as human as possible, it gives the client everything they could ever want, without pesky concerns over human rights and ethics.”

Sebastian glanced over at Ciel, where he sat with a silently indignant pout on his face. Sebastian could tell he had a lot to say - but perhaps he recognised that there was absolutely nothing he could say to actually help the situation. Not when Vincent saw him as little more than a sex toy. An object.

An object.

How, after spending any amount of time with Ciel, could someone believe that human rights concerns are unnecessary? Perhaps he wasn’t human - but when their mind is virtually indistinguishable from one, and their feelings genuinely affecting their mood - does that matter at all?

“I understand that you want people’s experiences to be as authentic as possible, and it’s done in the name of not coming into trouble with the law or real people - but when you make what is essentially a human, with everything from emotional development to bodily functions, you need to take responsibility for what you’ve done,” Sebastian leant forwards, boring his eyes right into Vincent’s. “These aren’t just robots anymore, Vincent. You need to dumb them down, or they’ll all end up like Ciel. All of them. You know what people are going to do to them. And eventually, the bots will get sick of it.”

The spark in the air flitting between their eye contact was palpable. Sebastian willed his stare to remain firm as he watched how Vincent’s jaw tightened. He heard Ciel swallow loudly next to him. Eventually, Vincent’s furious glare deflated into his usual smirk, and he laced his fingers together elegantly.

“... _Ciel?_ God, I should’ve known a sap like you would go and _name_ it,” he jeered. At last, he leant back in the chair again. “Fine. I get it. The fact that the bots have the capacity to build up negative emotions is what can lead to problems. Despite being a sap, I do trust your professional opinion.”

With that, Sebastian allowed himself a sigh of relief.

“For a moment there, I truly thought I was done for,” he breathed. Vincent chuckled as he sipped on his tea.

“Quite,” he remarked dryly. “Right. Well, there’s still the matter of figures I need to record, so I’ll swiftly move on to that. I shan’t rush you, though. Let’s both finish our tea before we get on with it, shall we?” Vincent shot a smile over to Ciel over the rim of his cup. Ciel wrinkled up his nose, and Sebastian couldn’t help but notice the way he shuffled back so that he was closer to Sebastian rather than the suspicious man facing them. In a moment of madness, he found himself wanting to wrap an arm around him, or hook a finger under the ribbon tied around his collar purely to antagonise Vincent, but he was quickly aware of how easily that could backfire in the context of an anxious Ciel.

The silence was strained and awkward as the three quietly sat and sipped their tea. However, Vincent didn’t seem at all bothered by the uncomfortable nature of the situation. It wasn’t that he didn’t realise - Sebastian was certain that he merely didn’t care. He sat calmly scanning his eyes over the details of the data sheet, contentedly drinking his tea as he went. Still, Sebastian was glad that he could at least be there to mediate the experience for Ciel; he didn’t quite trust Vincent to be alone with him.

But soon, he would be. Until he was sold to whatever corrupt, rich pervert - he would be alone with Vincent. He could only hope that whoever he was sold to wasn’t a complete and utter prick.

And then what would happen? Then what?

Whoever Ciel fell into the care of could be even worse than Vincent.

Sebastian didn’t want to think of Ciel belonging to anyone other than him. He knew Ciel better than anyone else - not to mention the fact that the boy genuinely liked him, if the way he’d started being so clingy was something to go by. Their relationship was valuable for the both of them. And Sebastian still hadn’t given up on bringing him around to the idea that perhaps, sex might actually feel rather good. Recently, he had been feeling rather encouraged by Ciel’s curious glances and flushed cheeks.

“Alright. I don’t know about you, _“Ciel”,_ but I’m ready to go,” Vincent announced, politely placing the mug back down on the glass of the coffee table. After a moment of hesitation, Ciel nodded, and nervously plonked his mug down, extremely clumsy in comparison to Vincent. “Sweet thing,” Vincent tagged on, apparently pleased with his being compliant.

“He should already be connected to the PC and ready to run,” Sebastian said, standing to go to Vincent’s side.

“Perfect,” Vincent smiled. Then, inexplicably, he put a hand to his belt, and began to undo it. Sebastian blinked, his mind uncharacteristically slow. He had been taken so off-guard by the lack of a full-out argument regarding the panic attack data that it took him a moment to wire up the connections in his mind. “Your room isn’t too far away, is it? The connection is quite strong, though, so it should be fine. Do you mind if we borrow it for ten minutes or so? Unless you’d like to watch, of course,” Vincent grinned wickedly at that proposition, entirely serious about the idea.

Unlike Sebastian, Ciel had realised what was going on the very moment his hand went to his belt. He had long disappeared from Sebastian’s side, and was now backed up into the kitchen, cowering behind the bar.

“No. I’m not- I’m not doing it. This time, _I refuse,”_ Ciel called out desperately, his wrists quivered where he was clutching onto the bar counter.

“Jesus. You’re a feisty little kitten, aren’t you?” Vincent smirked, shaking his head. Sebastian did not share his amusement.

“ _That’s_ what you were talking about when you said ‘collect data’? You… You can’t,” Sebastian latched onto Vincent’s arm like a vice, not allowing him to walk a single step further.

“Hm? What do you mean I _‘can’t’_? Good grief, Sebastian... Don’t tell me he’s already full to the brim today,” Vincent shook his head, reproachful. “Although if he is, I suppose I’m not too bothered. I’ve had my fair share of your bodily fluids in the past, after all,” he chuckled. Sebastian’s grip tightened around his forearm, not participating in his laughter with even so much as a smile.

“That’s not what I mean. You _know_ he’s absolutely terrified of sex. You can’t do that,” Sebastian said, his voice low, looking Vincent in the eye. Vincent sent him an incredibly puzzled look.

“Yes, I know. But how else am I supposed to record things such as climax length and stamina? Just wait around until he eventually can’t stand it anymore and jerks off? It’s not like he’ll have the strength to try to fight me off, either, so you don’t need to worry about me sustaining injuries. Besides, he’s a robot. In the end, he’ll be factory reseted anyway,” Vincent surmised. He went to move towards Ciel, and was quickly restrained by Sebastian. He grabbed his free arm, and pushed his shoulders together forcefully. 

“I won’t let you,” he stated, resolute as he dared Vincent to suggest otherwise. “He doesn’t like it.”

Slowly, Vincent inhaled. Of course, he rose up to the challenge. He steadily expelled the air from his lungs, then smoothly bent his arms up. His hand moved to grab onto Sebastian’s wrists, then clenched around them with a grip that matched the force that was clamping down on his own shoulders. A telltale response of biting his cheek let Sebastian know that now, he was teetering on the edge. The brink of pure rage.

“Sebastian,” he said lowly. “Don’t tell me you haven’t even fucked him once?”

Sebastian opened his mouth, but was interrupted before he could even begin to talk.

“Don’t answer. I honestly don’t care. But what a _waste_ it is; I gave the job to you because I knew he would be your type. But you didn’t even use him,” he breathed a sigh of great disappointment. “No matter. In the end, frankly, you have no right to tell _me_ what to do. You’re not even _using_ him. And he _belongs to_ **_me_ ** _.”_

“I won’t-”

“I own him. I made him. He is my company’s property,” Vincent glowered. “If you don’t move aside, my dear Sebastian, I shall have to force you to. He doesn’t belong to you, and I can do whatever I please with him.”

Panic began to rise from Sebastian’s gut right up into his throat. Vincent was entirely correct. In fact, just over a week prior, he would probably be inclined to agree with his actions. Ciel wasn’t a human, and testing would have to continue whether he objected to it or not. Because, in the end, his objections meant nothing.

And yet as he looked at how Ciel cowered behind the bar, he could still see nothing other than a deeply traumatised boy with no one else other than him to turn to. The very first good experience he’d had in life had been with Sebastian. When Ciel first arrived at the apartment, he was empty. Now, he smiled. He held Sebastian’s hand. He would look to him for comfort whenever he was feeling nervous. And now, was Sebastian just going to let all that progress be taken from him once again? Under his own roof, of all places? In the sole safe place Ciel had ever known?

But Ciel didn’t belong to him.

“Okay, fine. I understand well enough,” Sebastian moved to face Vincent head-on. He ignored the murderous look in his eyes. He let go of Vincent’s arms. “I’ll buy him.”

The furious glint in Vincent’s eyes morphed to shocked bewilderment.

“What? You must be joking,” he barked. “I don’t think you’re made of that sort of money. Moreover, even if you were, we already have buyers in line. He’s already been promised to someone.”

“How much is he?”

Vincent held Sebastian’s gaze, incredulous. 

“About _five hundred thousand pounds,_ Sebastian, you-”

“I’ll buy him.”

He only just about had enough to cover it. He would have to start his regular work again immediately, if they weren’t to run out of food and essentials.

“For God’s sake, won’t you listen?” Vincent shouted, his voice rising to an uncharacteristically high volume. “He’s already been taken. And I have to say, taken by someone who commands much more influence than _you._ I can’t just back out of the agreement. I’m taking this data whether you like it or not-”

Sebastian swiftly curled his fingers around the collar of Vincent’s jumper, then dashed forwards to pin him to the pale wall. He loomed over even taller than he usually was, and pressed his forehead to Vincent’s. Any uncertainty he’d had up until that point dissipated beneath the thunderous glare he deployed in front of Vincent’s eyes.

“I know where you live. I know your life story. I have your phone number,” Sebastian steadily enunciated each point one by one, keeping his voice subdued. “Who knows where I might release that information? If you don’t let me buy him, that is.”

Vincent fell totally silent. Ciel’s high-pitched, panicked breathing resounded throughout the room within the tension, while Vincent shot Sebastian a severe look that would send anybody else running. Sebastian was aware that this was a particularly sore spot. Vincent should have known better than to always be so paranoid with his business in front of Sebastian; otherwise, he wouldn’t have known this to be the best weakness to exploit.

“...Are you blackmailing me?” he scoffed, a disbelieving laugh playing on his lips. Sebastian pushed his nose closer, keeping him immobile in every way possible.

“No,” Sebastian said against his lips. “Not if you just let me buy him. I shan’t cheat you out of anything.”

Their hushed breaths intermingled in the small space between them, and even Ciel’s hyperventilating had calmed down in his sheer perplexity. Vincent kept their shared look through lidded eyes, weighing up something heavily in his mind. What, exactly, Sebastian was unsure. It was unlike Vincent to be so lost for words under threat, and he was hesitant to take it as a good sign when he could just as well be plotting his murder. Sebastian knew the sort of connections he upheld. If he had kept those in mind sooner, he might have realised just what a terrible idea attempting to blackmail Vincent was. Then again, he had already been disconcerted by how much he was willing to put at risk for a one gorgeous, tiny android the moment he dared to illegitimately make a copy of his files. If Vincent somehow found out about that too, his life would almost certainly be in danger.

Eventually, Vincent gently placed his hands on Sebastian’s forearms, and tapped them lightly twice, signalling to let go.

“If you’re really willing to pay in full for a faulty product, then I suppose I can’t exactly refuse you. From a business point of view, it measures up,” Vincent said with a resigned look, no mocking smile pulling at his lips anymore. “I dare say our client will simply have to learn to wait for the next batch. And if I won’t be paying you for this job, then I suppose I do at least owe you a favour for rooting out the cause of the issue. I’ll sell him to you.”

With the final confirmation that Vincent would take him up on the deal, Sebastian released his grip around his neck, and let his arms hang limply at his sides. 

“...Thank you,” he said, feeling somewhat pathetic, despite his victory. He had never antagonised Vincent in such a way before, and for it to be over something that he hadn’t even wanted to take care of in the first place was a colossal affront to his pride. Not to mention, he was going to be left in a near-penniless situation.

Vincent released a heavy groan, clearly not pleased with the outcome despite his backing down.

“Don’t think for a second that you don’t still owe me, though,” he prodded his index finger right in the centre of Sebastian’s sternum, hard enough that it hurt. “You’re lucky I’m fond of you and not typically the sort to have assassinations carried out on my behalf. Because God knows you’d be right at the top of my list.”

Sebastian chuckled half-heartedly, well aware of how much of a threat Vincent would be if he ever lost interest in him.

“Well, I don’t wish to waste any more time than I need to, especially what with all the extra paperwork and mitigations I’ll have to formulate with the original customer. Write me a cheque for the money now, and I’ll send you the paperwork once I receive the payment. I’ll make sure the bank won’t raise any queries about transferring such a large sum of money, don’t worry. Then I’ll be well out of Daddy’s way,” he smirked, casting a glance at Ciel, who was now bemusedly standing behind the bar. Thankfully, his panic had subsided upon realising that Sebastian would not allow him to be taken advantage of, and now the nerves had been replaced by stark astonishment.

“Of course,” Sebastian agreed, not letting Vincent out of his sight while he backed up to the sideboard to retrieve his chequebook. Carefully, he leant the book against the countertop, and meticulously wrote out the sum along with his signature. Undeniably, it was a debilitating loss of money. But he wouldn’t - and couldn’t - back out now. If he didn’t have quite so much self-control, perhaps his fingers would be shaking.

But they weren’t. Accordingly, he gracefully held the cheque out to Vincent with a flick of his wrist, and Vincent’s deft fingertips plucked the paper from his hand. He gave it the once-over before sliding it into his trouser pocket.

“Right-o,” Vincent announced, going to the front door to pick his coat off the peg. The usual smooth smile remained planted on his lips as he eyed both Sebastian and Ciel, casually shrugging his arms through the sleeves - but Sebastian could still tell he was not at all pleased with them, judging by the slight upturn at the corners of his eyebrows. Sebastian had seen him use the expression on many unfortunate souls in the past. Thankfully, he would soon get over it as long as he didn’t get into any trouble regarding this elusive oh-so-powerful customer.

“I’m off,” he said, his hand on the door handle. “I’ll be in contact via email.”

And just as quickly as he had arrived, with a slam of the front door, Vincent was gone.

Sebastian wasn’t quite aware of how tense he had been until a huge, relieved sigh escaped his lips upon the departure of the suffocating atmosphere. After a contemplative moment staring at the front door, he turned around to check on how Ciel was doing. Only, just as he did so, he felt a pair of thin arms gently snake around his waist, and he looked down to see swathes of midnight blue hair nestled into his chest. Tiny fingers clutched onto the fabric of his jumper at the small of his back, and a small body tentatively squeezed against his own.

“Sebastian,” he said, forehead buried into his chest. His beautifully smooth voice was thick with tears. “Thank you.”

All of the regret that had been building up inside him over spending an extremely large sum of money instantly evaporated into thin air. Now, Ciel was _his._ Well and truly _his._ And it was well within his power to keep him safe forever more.

He took a moment to process the fact that yes, the terrified little boy whose knees would start to shake if you so much as extended a hand in his direction was now managing to embrace Sebastian in a tight, grateful hug. Not only that, it was the first time he had called Sebastian by his name. It felt wonderful to hear his name in that gorgeous tone, and for Ciel to thank him with such a vulnerable gesture. 

After a dismayed, warm feeling settled in, Sebastian wrapped his arms around Ciel’s shoulders, and stroked the back of his head kindly, locks of silky hair running over the back of his fingers. Ciel didn’t shy away; he simply grabbed on tighter. Despite Sebastian’s self-imposed oath to keep his composure, he couldn’t help but let a particularly persistent feeling of affection pull his lips into a wide smile. Ciel was learning how to love. And so was Sebastian.

A blissful few minutes passed by languidly, each of them basking in the security of a genuinely fond embrace. That was, until Ciel suddenly grabbed him by the elbows, then pulled himself backwards so that he was able to look up into Sebastian’s idiotically serene face.

“But _why?”_ he began. “Why would you… Why would anyone do something like that for me?” Ciel questioned, a bewildered expression on his face as his eyes narrowed. “I don’t know much about money, but judging by your face, it was a lot. And you did that just so he wouldn’t scare me? Me, a _sex robot?_ You’re absolutely crazy. Unhinged. Off your rocker,” Ciel prodded the insides of Sebastian’s elbows with each jibe, his moment of vulnerability completely walled by sarkiness once more. Bringing a hand to his chin, Sebastian laughed.

“You’re not the first person to call me such things, so that doesn’t particularly bother me. Plus, it wasn’t _just_ so he wouldn’t hurt you. I admit that it was a completely impulsive decision, but I don’t regret it. I wanted you to stay with me.”

Ciel was still clearly unused to such declarations of affection within a life of abuse. He whipped around swiftly so that his back was turned towards Sebastian, but that wasn’t before Sebastian had caught sight of his porcelain skin flashing a pink shade, travelling right up to the tips of his ears. 

“Y-You’re weird,” he said, quite obviously delighted.

  
  


* * *

Sebastian had been incredibly presumptuous in assuming that their time together would get even easier from now on, with Ciel no longer worrying about getting forced into sexual acts, and Sebastian no longer having to do things against his own principles in order to get paid. Admittedly, there was none of that raw, unbridled fear that had been lingering over Ciel when he’d first arrived, and thank God, Sebastian had started work on his oh-so beautifully boring aeroplane codes again. Nevertheless, for some reason, Ciel had become strangely jumpy, and even more stubborn than usual.

The night after the ‘Vincent incident’, Ciel had been uncharacteristically subdued. He left Sebastian to finish baking the bread by himself, saying he’d learn another day. He didn’t comment on the taste of Sebastian’s curry dish. He didn’t grimace like usual when Sebastian brushed his teeth, and he didn’t bother waiting until Sebastian had gone to sleep before grabbing onto his hand. It wasn’t the same empty, dissociative fugue that had occupied his eyes in the past - but rather as if he were processing this huge change in his life. His future, his hopes, his feelings - there was a lot that had gone unattended to since he came into existence.

But to think that it would be an easy journey was foolish on Sebastian’s part. The day after the sale, Ciel scowled while Sebastian dressed him. He refused to eat both breakfast and lunch. He took two hours in the bath. He wouldn’t even come to sit next to Sebastian to watch a film with him in the evening. He simply sat in the armchair in the corner of the lounge, his head buried in one of Sebastian’s detective novels. No matter how much he attempted to engage with him, Ciel would snap back at him with curt answers. Quite frankly, Sebastian was beginning to feel ignored, lonely and bitter - especially after how clingy he had become last week. Regrettably, he had to admit he’d become used to his adorable little shadow.

“Ciel. Have I done something to upset you?” Unable to bear this dynamic any longer, Sebastian eventually gathered up the courage to ask the question that had been weighing heavy on him. He was halfway through watching Lord of the Rings - alone - looking over at where Ciel sat with his bare legs bent up in front of him.

“...No,” he replied from behind his book, not giving Sebastian the liberty of eye contact.

“Then why are you making such a point to ignore me? You had plenty of time to read while I was working. Can’t you join me just for a little bit?” he pleaded, patting the empty space next to him with an inviting hand. Ciel still didn’t raise his head from behind his book, but Sebastian did watch his toes curl into the chair cushion through his black cotton knee-high socks.

“I’m not ignoring you, okay? Not _everything_ is about you. If you’re lonely, talk to Chérie,” Ciel snapped, irritation clear in his strained tone. Sebastian sighed. He felt his eyebrows twitch, folding his arms as his temper was tested. Even if he _had_ wanted to talk to Chérie, Ciel had her attention completely captivated; she was curled up on his tummy, and purring as she sapped his warmth. Regardless, Sebastian wasn’t going to interrupt either of them just because he was feeling rather like a third wheel in his own home. Besides, he was worried about Ciel, and Sebastian didn’t wish to deprive him of Chérie when she often managed to calm his turbulent emotions simply by being a sweetheart.

He would just sit there, film playing, fragrant tea wafting in front of his nose, and be content with that. He always had been wholly satisfied with amusing himself before Ciel arrived. It should be no different to normal.

Sebastian let him be. He managed to make peace with himself for a while, knowing that Ciel was most likely just adjusting to all of the different feelings that must have been taking shape inside him. It was as Ciel said - there was no reason to take it so personally.

And yet, when Sebastian was halfway through brushing Ciel’s teeth, and he suddenly clamped his teeth down on the toothbrush then told Sebastian to ‘just go away’ (with a mouth full of toothpaste, no less), it became increasingly difficult to remind himself of this fact. Pitifully, as if he were a sulky child, Sebastian went straight to bed that night without gracing Ciel with so much as a ‘goodnight’. And then when he woke up in the morning, he saw Ciel lying awkwardly on the very edge of the bed, as distant as he could possibly be. A far cry from the sweet little thing who clung onto Sebastian’s hand for comfort. As he’d refused to ask for help, his oversized nightshirt was buttoned up on all the wrong holes, and his eyepatch was half-undone where he’d failed to undo the knot of the lace. It only made Sebastian even more irritated.

What happened to ‘thank you, Sebastian’? What happened to the tearful look in his eyes after Sebastian had spent the entire contents of his bank account on him? Did the trust that he’d been so grateful for only two days ago mean nothing to him now? As the situation stood, he’d paid half a million pounds for a grumpy live-in catsitter. 

_He’s still processing his trauma,_ he reminded himself. _Of course there will be times where he gets frustrated,_ he repeated in his mind.

That didn’t make it any less damn infuriating when all he was trying to do was be there for him.

He and Chérie ate breakfast alone. He ate lunch alone. The open-plan space remained otherwise empty all the while that he completed a day’s work. Mid-afternoon, he began to worry. Usually, Ciel would wake up once Sebastian untangled their fingers and got up to go to the toilet, but today, he’d made no sign of getting up whatsoever. After getting over his own bitterness, there came an internal panic over whether it was possible that Ciel had gone faulty, or if he wasn’t feeling well again. His concern for the boy won out over his petty anger.

When he gently pushed the door of the bedroom open, he peeked through the gap to see the lights still switched off. 

“Ciel?” he called tentatively, flicking the light switch. The yellow glow revealed Ciel’s figure still huddled up under the duvet, the very top of his head only just poking out the top. “Are you feeling alright? It’s well past lunchtime, you know.”

Sebastian cautiously padded over towards the bed to check that he was awake, but he was swiftly brought to a halt when a panicked voice shattered the subdued atmosphere.

_“Don’t come near me!”_ Ciel yelled, only curling into the bed sheets even tighter. The outline of his body underneath the sheets was shaking slightly.

Sebastian frowned. Quite clearly, everything was not okay. And yet, this was nothing like the panic attacks and trauma-related anxiety that Sebastian was already familiar with from him. In fact, it was profoundly more difficult to help him work through his feelings when he wouldn’t even permit Sebastian to look at him, nevermind hold a meaningful conversation with him.

“Please, tell me what’s wrong, Ciel. I can’t help you feel better if you don’t at least tell me that much,” Sebastian said across the empty space of the room, still frozen mid-step so as not to offend him any further. He was honestly, heartily trying his utmost to be gentle with him.

“Even if you _could_ help me, I wouldn’t want it from a crusty old man like you,” he said, still entirely on the defensive. Which apparently meant resorting to good old-fashioned insults. Still, knowing that it was simply an excuse to not talk about whatever was truly troubling him was all well and good... but _crusty?_ He was only twenty-eight years old, for God’s sake.

“Charming,” Sebastian scoffed. “I’m genuinely worried about you, and yet you think it well-mannered to slander the man who took you in?” he shifted his weight onto one hip, and folded his arms reproachfully.

“Well, I didn’t fucking ask to be made,” Ciel spat, his back still turned to Sebastian. It was the first time he’d used such words specifically to antagonise him, and Sebastian’s eyebrows automatically shot up.

“Language,” Sebastian reprimanded him. “I can tell you’re frustrated about something, but that’s no reason to swear about it.”

Perhaps this was some sort of strange robot rebellious phase? It was true that abused children often turn to trouble-making and isolation mechanisms - and Ciel did have very human-like thought processes, hence it was possible that this was just a normal part of working through things. Although, it did seem a very strange time for it to begin - just when he had started to heal and truly form a relationship with Sebastian.

“You can’t _fucking_ talk,” Ciel retorted, feet shuffling underneath the covers.

Sebastian’s teeth clenched. He most definitely added that one in on purpose. _Now,_ his patience was wearing thin, and it had been flimsy to begin with.

In large strides, he swiftly walked over towards Ciel, and leant his back against the wall facing him, peering down at Ciel with a severe glint to his eyes.

“I-I said d-don’t come near me. Do you have a memory malfunction, old man?” he shuffled back in the bed, his narrowed eyes squinting over the top of the duvet. Sebastian clicked his tongue.

“I know what you said, but as you won’t tell me what’s wrong, I still have to get a good look at you and check you’re unharmed.”

“What do you care? It’s not a crime for me to mind my own business. Don’t you get it? I don’t want to talk to you, and if you come any closer, I’ll punch you.”

Well. That certainly told him.

Only - why was he so adamant that Sebastian shouldn’t come anywhere near him? Even yesterday, when he had still been half-agreeable, he had suddenly removed himself from the situation whenever he was in close proximity to Sebastian for any length of time. He didn’t seem afraid, only nervous and defensive - so Sebastian was rather certain this wasn’t to do with his trauma. Or, perhaps it was - but regarding an entirely different facet of it altogether.

He wasn’t getting anywhere by being gentle with him. Anything and everything he said was rebutted with some sort of insult or bitter comment. He was worried; Ciel was sickly and fragile, and there was the added aspect that some of his issues might require immediate technical attention. And now, with the way he kept on curling up into the bedsheets and scrambling to move when Sebastian even threatened to walk up to him, Sebastian realised that it seemed like he was hiding something. But _what?_ Had another body part gone faulty, and he was trying to cover it up so that Vincent wouldn’t have to come over again? 

“Ciel. I’ll give you one chance. I won’t be angry with you, and whatever it is, I’ll do my best to help you right here and now. I just ask that you tell me what’s wrong. I’m worried. Please,” Sebastian pleaded in a low, smooth voice, putting all of his considerations into a last-ditch effort. Ciel glared at him.

“Go fuck yourself.”

Sebastian’s temper well and truly snapped. Sebastian was not a kind man; the situation with Ciel was an extreme outlier. What mattered to him was success, gourmet food, and money. And now, because Ciel had seized his heart so thoroughly, he had knowingly endangered his relationship with all three of these things. He had put both his life and pleasure at risk to care for him. Sebastian did not risk his pleasure for anything, if cats were exempt. And now that he had done so, Ciel had the cheek to disrespect him like this? 

Everything that had been churning deep within him for the past week bubbled to the surface. His composure was well and truly splintered. It was as if his arms and legs were moving of their own accord; his gut was filled with unbridled irritation, and he let himself be a slave to it as pure adrenaline propelled his body towards the bed.

“Wait, don’t-! I said _DON’T COME H-!”_

To preclude the punch Ciel had oh-so kindly promised him, Sebastian tore the covers away from his body, clamped each of his hands around each of Ciel’s flailing wrists, then threw them upwards and outwards so that they were pinned against the headboard. Ciel let out a high-pitched grunt, struggling against the pressure. The dark purple duvet now lay limp at Ciel’s feet, exposing his trembling body, the wrongly-buttoned pyjama shirt, and- _oh-_

“Oh, honey…” 

An immediate guilt washed over Sebastian, and in his regret, he softened the grip around Ciel’s wrists a little. Ciel was staring up at Sebastian with a tearful, ashamed look in his eye, his mouth opening and closing as he gasped and wrestled to find an explanation, or _something_ to say. 

What he had been trying so desperately to hide was unmissable; there was the fact that there was a huge wet patch underneath his bottom. At first, Sebastian had thought he’d wet himself again, but then he realised that the substance was strangely shiny against the sheets, and a little thicker than water - it looked like it might feel quite sticky or slippery. A self-produced lubricant, perhaps? Then, he noticed that within Ciel’s soaked shorts, his little cock was standing rock hard against the fabric, the wet material leaving very little to the imagination. Sebastian gulped. _Hard._ His self-restraint was dangerously close to being completely lost.

“Sh-Shut up,” Ciel said, ashamed, before he let a single sob escape his lips, clearly mortified.

“I-I’m so… I really do apologise,” Sebastian said remorsefully, finally letting go. Now, he was very unsure as to what he should do with himself. He shouldn’t have been so forceful with him; having no good associations with sexual feelings, Ciel would have no way of knowing how to process these things - understandably.

“I did tell you. I’m… I’m disgusting. No one’s even having sex with me, b-but it keeps happening, and I can’t get it to stop,” he finally admitted, a sorrowful expression eventually overtaking his bitter façade. “I-It’s like my body is betraying me. I don’t want that stuff to happen to me again, but… my body…”

_Poor thing._

Everything he had been told back at _that place_ had made him truly, unquestioningly believe that all he existed for was to be a catalyst for other people’s sexual pleasure, no matter whether he wanted it or not. No matter whether it was abuse or not. So much so, that it seemed he believed even his natural libido was some sort of secret desire to be abused again - because that was what he was made for. 

In a way, Sebastian could personally empathise. After feeling unwanted and unloved his entire life, he had felt guilty when things actually started going well for him. As if he was going against some kind of predetermined course for what he was and wasn’t allowed to feel. How nonsensical.

“Is this why you’ve been acting strangely these past few days? Because this kept happening and you didn’t know how to deal with it?” Sebastian said, slowly moving to gently perch himself on the edge of the bed next to Ciel. Ciel used his now-free hands to guiltily cover up his erection, collapsing in on himself. He nodded shyly, a single tear finally breaking free from his damp eyelashes. Sebastian sighed.

“I want you to listen closely, alright? This is nothing to be ashamed of. It’s not something disgusting, nor does it make _you_ disgusting. Okay?” Sebastian said tenderly, reaching out with one hand and beginning to rub circles into Ciel’s back, his fingertips brushing over the boney sections of his spine. He jolted upon the contact, but quickly settled into it after looking up at Sebastian with curious eyes, processing what he’d just been told. “In no way does it mean that your body wants those things to happen again. This happens to everyone. It’s natural; I promise you.”

Ciel fell silent for a little, pursing his lips as Sebastian rubbed steady circles into his hunched back.

“It even happens to you?” he asked eventually, resting his cheek on his knee as he looked up at Sebastian, his misty blue eyes ever so sweet. Sebastian’s heart lurched, untameable in the face of a boy so adorable.

“Even me.” 

_Apart from having a self-lubricating ass,_ he remarked to himself as he glanced at the sticky bed sheets. He did consider explaining human anatomy, but it didn’t feel quite appropriate to other Ciel’s body even more when he was already struggling so endlessly with his own identity.

“...Then what should I do?” Ciel asked. “E-Everything’s aching so much that I can hardly bear it.”

Ciel had no idea of the effect that he was having, but if he kept on saying such things in that gorgeous voice of his, _Sebastian_ was going to be the one with the problem.

“Well,” Sebastian began, his hand pausing on Ciel’s back. He withdrew it, just in case the touch might start alarming him once the topic turned to sex. “If you go to the bathroom - alone - and keep on touching yourself where it aches, it should eventually feel good… And after that, it’ll calm down for a while. Or if you still don’t feel comfortable touching those places yet, I find that taking a cold shower helps.”

“...But it can happen again?” Ciel said, an anxious look on his face.

“Almost definitely,” Sebastian said plainly. “As I say, it happens to all of us.”

“Then what am I supposed to do?!” Ciel’s voice suddenly grew loud, and Sebastian was left speechless when confronted with his pleading eyes. “Over the past few days, it happens whenever I’m anywhere near you! Even if I get it to stop, it just happens when I next see you! Or even when I think about you! Why?! Why do I feel so nervous around you? Why do I always want to be with you? I can’t live like this forever!” he cried, a tearful eye staring straight into Sebastian’s soul.

_Oh._

Sebastian blinked, peering down at Ciel’s panicked expression. When he looked closely, he could see his lower body trembling slightly. 

In effect, hadn’t he just been entrusted with a confession of love? For a sex robot, it made total sense that feeling sexual attraction for somebody would set off all those sorts of responses, especially under the assumption that they wouldn’t become sexually frustrated. The robots had been produced intending that they would be engaging in regular sexual activity, after all. And if Ciel was repressing all of his sexual feelings, while also being close to someone he liked very much…

Sebastian opted to try his luck.

“Ciel…” he said, looking kindly into that beautiful blue eye. “If you haven’t taken care of things down there in a while, it’s normal for it to become like that when you’re around someone you like very much. Or someone you might be sexually attracted to. And if you’re feeling so frustrated around me, specifically... Do you perhaps have feelings for me?” Sebastian asked, feeling uncharacteristically shy. Yet, he would still call this confession progress in their relationship, even if Ciel were to cuss him out now just as he did earlier.

Ciel nervously rubbed his feet together on the bed, and looked between Sebastian’s face and the wall.

“...Maybe,” he admitted nervously. Sebastian’s chest squeezed. “When I look at you, I feel something I’ve never felt before. Don’t feel special about it though - I _can_ see your face, you smug creature,” Ciel suddenly interjected, pouting at the idiotic smile on Sebastian’s lips. “But I just worry that… if I say yes, I do have feelings for you… would that mean we have to have sex? I don’t-” his lip trembled a little. “I’m not sure I’m ready to even touch my-... my thing, nevermind be expected to… do _that_ stuff again.”

He looked down at his toes sadly, to which Sebastian’s heart sunk a little. Ciel’s idea of relationships was so horribly skewed; the fact that to him, admitting to having feelings for someone meant you were basically giving in to being _raped_ was such a disturbing concept.

“Ciel,” Sebastian said firmly. “I already informed you - although I do find you very desirable, I would not force anything on you. The same goes for if you return my feelings. We won’t do anything you don’t want to, and if you _do_ decide that you’re comfortable enough to do things which are a little more heated, then I would treat you very gently. This might surprise you to know, Ciel, but I don’t think you’ve ever actually had sex.”

Ciel shot him a blank stare. Sebastian quickly backtracked.

“What I mean is: you’ve been sexually abused. You haven’t had the experience of _wanting_ it before. However, if you were to give me permission to have sex with you, I think you’d find the encounter entirely different. Even enjoyable. Sex doesn’t hurt, not unless you want it to,” Sebastian grinned for a moment. “There is an extremely vast spectrum of things to do, as well. If one thing makes you panic, we could try something else. This is all hypothetical though, anyway - you don’t have to do it at all, but I’m at least giving you the option.”

Ciel peered at his knees, contemplative. He moved his hands to squeeze the tops of his own ankles in a kind of comforting gesture, and Sebastian could just about see down in between the top of his shoulder and his bent knees. His tiny erection was still rock hard. His smooth thighs were still trembling with how it ached. He very much deserved to have them grabbed onto while having his little cock worshipped, and Sebastian would give it to him in a heartbeat. Against his utmost wishes, Sebastian tore his eyes away before he got caught looking.

“...I guess you’re right,” Ciel said, and his eyebrows bunched up apologetically. “Sorry I was so rude to you. I just didn’t know how t-”

“It’s fine, poppet. I know,” Sebastian assured him. Ciel’s eyes fluttered close, and he took a few deep breaths before opening them again.

“So if that’s how it is, I suppose I might as well tell you properly,” he said. “I… feel something for you. I feel safe with you. You make me feel warm. For the first time in my life, because of you, I started to understand what the word ‘love’ might mean, even if it’s only a little. I know nothing about romance, but... if you’re interested in me like that, then I’d like to give it a go. If you want,” he stuck on the end, suddenly bashful despite having just poured his heart out.

Sebastian felt as though all of his misfortune growing up had almost been paid off with this one moment alone. As had been a much more frequent occurrence ever since Ciel had arrived, he was unable to suppress the smile that spread across his lips. All of his frustrations from the past couple of days were extinguished in one confession, and Sebastian realised that yes, this beautiful, ever-intriguing brat had certainly been worth blowing his entire bank account on.

“Of course I _want,”_ he smiled, daring to interlace his own warm fingers in between Ciel’s petite ones where they were resting on his ankles. He then moved to kneel on the carpet just in front of where Ciel was sitting, and looked up at him dutifully. Embarrassed to be pinned by such a reverent gaze, Ciel looked down at where their hands were entwined, and a deep blush pigmented his too-pale skin. Sebastian rubbed his thumb over his fingertips delicately. “I promise I will treat you extremely well. If I don’t, you are entirely within your right to call me _crusty_ again.”

That made Ciel smirk, but apparently, he was still bearing the weight of their mutual feelings as it died down into a wonderfully serene smile, and an even darker blush turned his skin pink. It made Sebastian desperately want to embrace him. This time, he finally let himself act on the impulse.

Gently, Sebastian shuffled closed to the bed, and swiped his hand from where it held Ciel’s until it clasped onto his shoulder. When there was no protest from Ciel, only a shy glance upwards, Sebastian leant over and encircled his left arm around Ciel’s shoulders until his head was cradled against his chest. A sigh escaped his lips, as if this were something he had been craving his entire existence, and he soaked the moment up as though it would recharge his sheer life energy. After a beat or two, Ciel nervously returned his embrace, even if he manoeuvred his arms as if he had never used them before in his life. Stiffly, his forearms came around Sebastian’s back, then his fingertips gripped onto him with all his might as he released a shaky breath onto Sebastian’s throat.

“...It’s so warm.”

Sebastian just about heard him mutter it into his neck, an element of surprise to his tone. In reply, he simply pressed a tender kiss to the top of Ciel’s head, and Sebastian wondered if he was the first one to ever do so. He sincerely hoped so. He placed yet another one there just for good measure.

“...Sebastian,” Ciel said awkwardly, eventually breaking the tranquility of the moment. He wriggled like a trapped kitten in Sebastian’s arms, and Sebastian released him promptly to see what was bothering him. He bit his bottom lip bashfully, eyeline darting around. “Th-This does feel quite nice, but if you keep me here much longer, y-your mattress will get soaked the entire way through.”

Sebastian was tempted to say that he didn’t care, that they could buy a new mattress if need be. Then, he quickly reminded himself of his recently-developed financial situation, as well as the fact that he should probably give Ciel space to handle his newly-formed sexual desires.

“Ah,” Sebastian said ungraciously in realisation, quickly stepping backwards. Once given a clear path to the hallway, Ciel urgently hopped off the bed, his knees shaking as he sheepishly hid his erection and stumbled off towards the bathroom. Sebastian soon heard the shower start running after the door slammed shut. _Cold shower, then. Oh well._

With a strange sense of déjà vu, once again, Sebastian was left alone with a horrendous pile of washing sitting in front of him. However, this time, as he stripped the sheets and unbuttoned the duvet cover, he couldn’t deny the presence of a bizarre pool of affection settling in his gut. He had never known what it was like to be a schoolboy with an all-consuming crush, but it occurred to him that it must feel something like this. Every moment was _Ciel, Ciel, Ciel_ – and although it had shaken him a little at first to be giving such consideration to what was technically an object, he was over the shame of it. He didn’t regret it in the slightest.

Laundry had never given him such joy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [twitter](http://twitter.com/atsukunai)


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